Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

A haunted house, but it’s just all apps and websites where you got logged out but can’t remember your password.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

When someone sits in the empty seat beside you: flattered yet annoyed. When no one sits in the empty seat beside you: offended yet relieved.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

I am “We read the newspaper front to back every single day,” years old.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Tupperware is filing for bankruptcy. They would have kept a lid on the news but they couldn’t find one.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

The downside to getting in a hammock is having to get out of the hammock.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Glory hole but for forehead kisses.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,744

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Facebook:

Spiders have the whole world to explore but still try to come up in my house.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Not single, not dating, but a secret third thing (quantum entanglement).

Trending via LinkedIn:

Seeing a BBL in real life is a reality-altering experience.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

Just shared via Pinterest:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Santa keeps a pair of mounted antlers over his fireplace to keep the reindeer from unionizing.

Shared recently on Discord:

I only use ‘sir’ disrespectfully.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

Nutrition labels should include an “What if I ate the whole thing” section.

3 weeks ago

Playful text highlighting humor about overindulgence on nutrition labels.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Reading nutrition labels is like embarking on a guessing game, but wouldn't it be fun to have a 'What if I ate the whole thing' section? 🤔🍔🍟 Imagine the shock on our faces when we realize the whole bag of chips was meant to serve more than just a quick snack break! 😂 #SurpriseCalories"

eating, food, humor, i, labels, nutrition, section, thing, whole, whole thing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on WeChat this month:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

21 shares on Threads this month:

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.

92 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

26 shares on X this month:

Kitchen sex, because it might be your only chance of getting laid on an island this summer.

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

40 shares on Twitch this month:

All of my fitness goals are within reach, but unfortunately, so are the crisps.

94 shares on Reddit this month:

If I ask “What’s your zodiac sign?” it’s either because we’re vibing or you’re getting on my nerves.

99 shares on TikTok this month:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

75 shares on Facebook this month:

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by saying they look tired.

33 shares on Discord this month:

Going through life with a signature I invented as a teenager.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I just bought a universal remote. This changes everything.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

This sex could have been an email.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The only constant in my life are the accidental screenshots of my lock screen.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

It turns out, as you get older, you don’t actually figure anything out; you just don’t have any energy to care anymore.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Unfortunately for everyone, I will keep doing whatever I want.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, having zero balance in my account, viewing houses worth 10 million, and being like, “No, I don’t like the kitchen.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,591

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Does my career know that I’m pursuing it, or is it another one-sided relationship?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

There are two types of people: Those who steal food off your plate and those who you keep in your life.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

It’s so hot that my shadow just went back inside and gave me the finger.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I need a day off from myself.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

Spotted on Threads:

I found out why my computer keeps freezing. Apparently, I’ve got too many windows open.

Just landed via Discord:

Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago and it actually fit. So proud of myself. It was a scarf, but still, let’s be positive here.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Today, I changed a light bulb and walked into a bar. My life is a joke.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I hate taking my pants off at the dentist. So humiliating.

Just landed via Facebook:

My goal is to do one thing each day that could prevent me from being elected to political office.

Seen just now on Discord:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

Just landed via Reddit:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

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