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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΆπŸ‡¦ has downloaded:

Can you imagine how awkward it would be if your pet went on your phone and found the 1,000 pictures you have of them sleeping.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡¬ has copied:

I would never be comfortable delivering a baby. I can’t even remove an avocado pit without dropping it.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡· has viewed:

Someone taking your parking space at your own home is a different type of anger.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡΅ has bookmarked:

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡² has copied:

Money talks, but all mine ever says is goodbye.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡» has shared:

Watching as gravity slowly unfriends you.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡° has shared:

I’m afraid to go to therapy β€” what if they fix me and I lose my funny?

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

4,056

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Broadcasted on Discord:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’m convinced a lot of people online are communicating from prison.

Live now on Instagram:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

Making waves on WeChat:

The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Going bananas on Slack:

I’m in a long-distance relationship with the stars.

Going viral on Threads:

My psych professor asked if we’d heard of Pavlov. I said, “It rings a bell.” No one laughed; I’m too witty for this class.

Making waves on Twitch:

Unfortunately, it only strengthens my spirit when the summer people mourn their terrible season.

They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.

They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.
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Commentary:
Well, it seems like your money has mastered the art of saying "see ya later" with a flourish! πŸ’ΈπŸ‘‹ Maybe it's practicing for a future career in dramatic exits? Keep an eye out for those swanky handkerchiefs next time you're at the ATM! πŸ˜„

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Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,852

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ή has copied:

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡ͺ has copied:

If I’m ever in a coma, please put chapstick on my lips.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ώ has bookmarked:

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ή has copied:

I’m a simple person. All I need in life to be happy is to have everything go my way and work out how I want it to.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡° has bookmarked:

My kid asked me if I’ve ever experienced hallucinations, which is an odd thing to ask considering I don’t have any kids.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¦ has shared:

I’m blunt because the universe rolled me that way.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has shared:

People be like, β€œI’m a work in progress” and never make any progress.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Everyone hates drama, yet somehow the tabloids remain in business.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Any room can be a rage room if you just give me a minute.

Shared recently on X:

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

Just landed via Discord:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Seen just now on Instagram:

You got a better chance getting chased by a dog than by me.

Making waves on Instagram:

Oh good. Another day.

Live now on TikTok:

Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

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