Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

God: “You’re all a bunch of bastards and I should never have created you.”

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

No president next term. America needs to be single for a while to focus on herself.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

The night terrors don’t scare me half as much as the day terrors.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

The problem is I am always the problem.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

The only thing longer than the opening ceremony of the Olympics is the opening ceremony of my eyes in the morning.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Sunsets and women are undoubtedly God’s best creations.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

If I say “with all due respect,” nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

First, they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.