Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.
  • The most important thing I learned in life, and I can’t stress enough, it doesn’t matter where you went to college. The only thing that matters is that you’re really hot.
  • I’d like to thank the municipal snow plow for recreating the wall from Game of Thrones at the end of my driveway.
  • How come it’s called “thrift store shopping” instead of Goodwill hunting?
  • The leading cause for injury in old men is them thinking they are still young men.
  • You’d think the heat and humidity would steam some of the wrinkles out of my body.