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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Just saw a piece of jewelry made in the 80s described as “vintage,” so I’ll be laying down the rest of the day.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

She didn’t leave you on read, bro. You left her on speechless.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Wish I could just go back to eating cookies and not knowing what day it was.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Hungry me has no respect for bathroom scale me.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Girls … I understood why they advise us to get married and have kids before 25. Because after that, our brain starts working, and the decision won’t seem so reasonable anymore.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Proudly doing my part to cause the male loneliness epidemic.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

They should invent a type of sleeping where you wake up feeling rested.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,967

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

Spices were first brought to Western Europe in the Middle Ages. Some of them are still at the back of my cupboard.

Going viral on Slack:

I’m not accepting the bare minimum; I need you to shake it to the max.

Going viral on Twitch:

My grandfather tried to warn them about the Titanic. He screamed and shouted about the iceberg and how the ship was going to sink, but all they did was throw him out of the theater.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Which one of you shrunk all of my jeans?

Breaking via TikTok:

If you see this, straighten your back, you banana-shaped mess.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

Just landed via Discord:

Before ball parks were invented there was pretty much no way to give someone a rough estimate.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

Breaking via Facebook:

If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,652

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

Maximizing rent value by turning ‘homebody’ into an Olympic sport!

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Hey (with the intention of going to sleep).

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

Stop making Fast and Furious movies.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

You’re a “haha” girl, and I’m an “lol” guy. It just wouldn’t work.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

We argue about where to go for dinner for so long, it eventually becomes an argument on where to go for breakfast.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Hey dude, I recently became omniscient, and well, you fell off in every universe.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

My only knowledge of animals is that turtles like pizza and cats like lasagna.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Even Hotmail is hotter than me.

Just landed via WeChat:

“I’m at the age where, if I use the wrong pillow at night, it hurts to turn my head the next day.”

Trending via LinkedIn:

Oh, him? He’s my insignificant other.

Going viral on Twitch:

There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

Spotted on Instagram:

Wanted to report a YouTube video, but there is no option for “Cringe”, so I just picked “Terrorism”.

Seen just now on TikTok:

A murder on the dance floor would explain the panic! at the disco.

Trending via Snapchat:

Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

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