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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Shazam, but for the name of the person who literally just introduced themself to me.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

“Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight!” Okay, then explain bayonets to me.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

I ordered one of those Tempura mattresses. Way too crunchy.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

If you need ChatGPT to write an email, maybe you shouldn’t have job.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Wow, you did such a great job clicking in your little spreadsheets today. Super proud of you.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Family Guy is so insane because, why were people dating that dog?

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Hate when I have to be mean. Why would you push a sweet girl this far?

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

I always tell my kids that it’s okay to make mistakes just as long as you learn how to blame them on other people.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2437 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,599

Funny Quotes Topics

15,267

Funny Quotes Images

12,599

Updated

40 minutes ago

Users Online

3,468

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

I want to be gangsta but my grandma said no.

Making waves on Discord:

80 percent of my life now is just “hmmmm… should I bring my jacket or not?”

Shared recently on Slack:

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Spotted on TikTok:

Helpful police officer reminded me he’s the one asking the questions.

Shared recently on Discord:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I’m capable of doing a lot of things but listening to people chew their food is not one of them.

Reported on Pinterest:

Dark mode changed me. White screens now feel like staring into the sun.

Just landed via Slack:

Sneaking up behind people and marrying them.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2437 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,599

Funny Quotes Topics

15,267

Funny Quotes Images

12,599

Updated

40 minutes ago

Users Online

3,466

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

I asked my dad what his favorite joke was. He said, “I can’t pick a favorite. I love you and your sister equally!”

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Laying in a hammock is essentially saying, “I hope there are no emergencies.”

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Elect a clown, expect a circus.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, spreading goat cheese on a bagel.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Never let your job prevent you from acting unemployed.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

If she says “it’s fine,” you’re probably in trouble.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Twitch:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Tested positive for needing a kiss.

Trending via WeChat:

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Seems like being an asshole is a full-time job for some.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

Just shared via Instagram:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a boy that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Spotted on YouTube:

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

Trending via Snapchat:

If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

Trending via Reddit:

Two words have helped me open a lot of doors in my life. Push and Pull.

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