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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

Me to alien: I, too, try to live among people undetected.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

You don’t know about stupidity until your female friends open up about their love life.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

I voted for the candidate on the last yard sign I saw before pulling in. Slow children at play will lead us into the future.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Basically a lot of my problems boil down to me being really bad at waking up, and also really bad at going to sleep.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Sorry, the deadline for complaints was yesterday.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

No one told me middle age would be so fuzzy, and if you are wondering whether I mean my eyesight or my facial hair, yes.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Trying to decide what to burn for dinner, so I can order pizza.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Most earthquakes could have been an email.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2327 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,489

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,489

Updated

10 minutes ago

Users Online

3,457

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Reported on X:

Deeply unfair of people to assume I have my life together just because I’m boring.

Trending via Messenger:

Hobbies include fake smiling while waiting for people to stop talking.

Making waves on TikTok:

I want to be gangsta but my grandma said no.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

My summer body has been pending for about ten years.

Breaking via Telegram:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Trending via Twitch:

When a girl is done with you, she talks to you like she’s in HR or something.

Seen just now on Threads:

Mount Rushmore would be way more American if all the presidents were eating.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Old and bitter feels much better than I thought it would.

Shared recently on Discord:

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2327 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,489

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,489

Updated

10 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

Is it better to beat someone to the punch or punch someone to the beat?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

We work all week to work some more around the house all weekend long. Isn’t life grand?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

It seems that after checking my bank account, I need to turn to a life of crime.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

Kids: making things way more difficult when they don’t have to be, since the dawn of man.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

Making waves on Messenger:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Going viral on X:

Netflix has every movie except the one you want to watch.

Just shared via Facebook:

Apparently, it’s rude to poke someone in the forehead and yell “Skip Intro” when they start talking to you.

Spotted on X:

So many mistakes to make, so little time.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Counting calories is a great way to combine super fun things like math and not eating.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Reported on Facebook:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Just landed via Discord:

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

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