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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends meetings early.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

I’ve deleted enough tweets to know that I should never get a tattoo.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Roses are red. Pizza sauce is too. I ordered a large. And none of it’s for you.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

When I like a woman, I start to gather gifts for her like a squirrel hoarding nuts.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Sometimes you choose the GIF-war over your responsibilities.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

I hate being in that mood where nothing’s really wrong but nothing feels right either.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

I am absolutely unstoppable, unless it’s a bit rainy.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

If you tell me to watch until the end, the end better be in five seconds.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,629

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Ever since I was little, I always knew I wanted to retire.

Spotted on Slack:

I’ve finally found a book that speaks to me. I believe it’s called an “audiobook”.

Going viral on Telegram:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Ghost stories sound way scarier with an English accent.

Making waves on TikTok:

I don’t think fish should be allowed to eat other fish. I don’t know. Just seems weird. That’s like your coworker, dude.

Just shared via Telegram:

Source? It was revealed to me on my walk.

Just shared via X:

I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

Spotted on WeChat:

I hate when people ask me what I meant by something. Listen, I have no idea. I’m as confused here as you are. We’re both learning what I’m about to say at the exact same time.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Study international relations and political science if you watch the news and think, I’d like this to make me even more depressed.

Just landed via X:

I like when games that have no need for a jump button have a jump button.

Funny funny event quotes

Funny funny event quotes are the secret sauce to turning any gathering into a laugh-out-loud fiesta! 🎉😂 Whether you’re hosting a party, wedding, or casual hangout, these witty lines bring joy, spark smiles, and keep the good vibes rolling. 😄✨ Get ready to sprinkle some humor and make memories that everyone will be talking about long after the event ends! 🎈🎤 #GoodTimes #LaughOutLoud

New funny funny event quotes 👇

All funny funny event quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

11 shares on Pinterest this month:

Am I finishing my education or is my education finishing me?

25 shares on Reddit this month:

Taylor Swift is a psyop designed to get my wife to hum little tunes here and there.

58 shares on Instagram this month:

Stopped using exclamation points in work messages so my coworkers know they’ve killed my spirit.

20 shares on Reddit this month:

Don’t forget to overestimate your importance today.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

Born to be a frolicker of the forest, forced to be a cog in the machine.

10 shares on Pinterest this month:

They should invent a self-checkout where someone else scans the items and puts them in a bag.

54 shares on Instagram this month:

Meeting Beyoncé and telling her I loved her in Goldmember and mentioning nothing about her music career, just to see if it throws her off.

73 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Does anyone actually know how to pronounce Worcestershire sauce correctly, or do we all just stumble through it and hope for the best?

64 shares on Reddit this month:

If you apply enough sunscreen, the rain simply rolls off.

26 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Maybe the real American dream is the debt we collected along the way.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

People who ask “Can I call you” are so sweet. Like, obviously you cannot, but so sweet.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

You know you’re a bad cook when the dog won’t lick the plate.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Normalize saying “better you than me” to people who keep complaining about everything.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s amazing, when it’s your birthday you really feel the love from family, friends, lovers, former dentists, yoga studios and various smootheries.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Nearly choked on a carrot. A donut would never do that to me.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Schrodinger’s Immigrant: A person who is simultaneously too lazy to work, but is also stealing your job.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes you send an email that requires a response, and the other person writes back right away, and it’s like NO NOT YET.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,590

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

If you like Christmas so much, why don’t you merry it?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Everyone’s worried about a recession, but babes, we’re heading for a dark age.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

I got so lost there for a minute (several years).

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

A toddler in their “why” phase makes you realize how little you know.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Water is a drink whose flavor is its temperature.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

Parents will give you a lecture about fake friends and then get scammed by their own siblings.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Make your salad taste better by putting it between bread, meat, cheese, and Big Mac sauce.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Best threesome: me, my bed and my pillow.

Trending via WeChat:

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Taking my heart off my sleeve, I fold it up neatly and carefully place it back inside my chest.

Spotted on Threads:

I’m not lazy, I’m just highly selective about what I suffer for.

Spotted on YouTube:

Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

Breaking via TikTok:

I support Bluesky in theory, but in practice, it’s like a JRPG with no bad guys.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Why socialize when you could party inside your room with your 10+ personalities?

Shared recently on Facebook:

I have never “lit up a room” unless you count arson.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Ever ghost an entire event to avoid one ghost from your past?

Seen just now on YouTube:

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

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