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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

College is literally just you, your laptop, and your water bottle against the world.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Moms be like, “I needed this,” and it’s really just a break from being the one who holds it all together every single day.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

You don’t get much engagement? Have you tried being retarded.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

The homie who’s ultimately just a pawn in your grand scheme.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Current relationship status: sleeping diagonally across the bed.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Boobs always win. That’s why we don’t play rock, paper, boobs.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

It was the kind of movie that kept you on the edge of your seat, waiting for something interesting to happen.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Good morning, did you have a nice weekend? I ask my many open work tabs.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,314

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

A Monday every week is excessive.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

The final level of being smart is just pretending you don’t know anything to make your life easier.

Making waves on TikTok:

“I’d rather hurl myself into an active volcano!” -me, politely declining dates.

Making waves on YouTube:

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s all that happens in small towns.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

Shared recently on Facebook:

Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

Going viral on X:

My middle finger salutes you.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Welcome to your 50s, you now take supplements to help your memory, but you can’t remember if you took them today.

Going viral on Telegram:

If barking at nothing was an Olympic sport, my dog would win gold.

Funny good deed quotes

New funny good deed quotes 👇

Whoever coined, “No good deed goes unpunished”, must have fed some seagulls.

2 weeks ago

deed, feeding, good, good deed, humor, irony, punishment, seagull

All funny good deed quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Reddit this month:

I feel sorry for Netflix era kids. They will never know the high stakes adrenaline of running away in an ad break, with the beckoning call of a sibling screaming “It’s ON!” to send you hurdling over furniture to get back in time.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

Unfollowing girls on Instagram as soon as they get a boyfriend is something I’ll never stop doing.

91 shares on WeChat this month:

(Seeing the guy next to me reading a novel) You know, none of that happened, right?

61 shares on Reddit this month:

Today I choose kindness, but we’ll see, it’s still early.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

49 shares on Twitch this month:

Welcome to your 50s. If you don’t have a mysterious ailment, one will be assigned to you shortly.

92 shares on Discord this month:

I’m probably like this because I drank water from the hose.

64 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

My account is fake, I’m actually your probation officer.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Billionaires didn’t get rich by working harder. They got rich by making sure you work harder, get paid less, and spend more.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Kinda miss being a child and wondering why the moon follows me.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 50’s; you can have a really good laugh at everyone moaning about their aches and pains in their 30’s.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Panties is such a weird word. Panties. I can’t say it sexy.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I’m at the age where using the wrong pillow makes you feel like you broke your neck.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

The struggle to get off the couch and into bed is real.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Don’t bother telling me where you’re from, I have no geographical knowledge and no sense of direction.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

This morning, like every morning, he practiced his quick draw of his finger guns in the bathroom mirror, because you just never know.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

The ability to adjust your vocabulary based on who you’re speaking to is a valuable life skill that many people lack.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

Just shared via Threads:

I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

Breaking via YouTube:

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

Going viral on Pinterest:

“People you may know” and it’s someone I would set on fire.

Just shared via X:

My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

Spotted on X:

My skin is so dry it’s doing a PowerPoint presentation.

Making waves on Facebook:

I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.

Spotted on Instagram:

What doesn’t kill you will text you in 5 months to ask “What are you doing?”

Spotted on Discord:

Pro tip: Invest in pasta companies. Worth every penne.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny good deed quotes

New funny good deed quotes 👇

Whoever coined, “No good deed goes unpunished”, must have fed some seagulls.

All funny good deed quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨