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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

If you need me, I will be at the library sniffing old books.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

If you don’t fall in love with me, I’ll write poetry about you and then you’ll regret it.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

I did not “try to rob a bank,” I just “aspired” to obtain more money.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

She doesn’t want flowers, she wants to invoke an ancient curse.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

45 minutes ago

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

Reported on Reddit:

It’s funny how when you’re at work, “Go to hell” comes out as “No problem.”

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

You gotta wonder why they just don’t make all bread garlic bread.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Can anyone recommend some good behaviors for someone who just started behaving?

Trending via Snapchat:

Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

Going viral on Instagram:

The sexual orientation where you’re attracted to both and men and women but they’re not attracted to you is called Bi-yourself.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’m now at the age where happy hour is a nap.

Live now on WeChat:

Tell your dog I said woof woof.

Making waves on TikTok:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Broadcasted on X:

There could be a ghost aggressively breakdancing beside you right now and you’d have no idea.

Home » Funny Googled Quotes

Funny googled quotes

New funny googled quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: So I just googled my symptoms, turns out I’m addicted to you.

Commentary:
"Looks like you've got a serious case of love fever, and there's no cure! 😂❤️ Time to enjoy the addictive side effects of romance! 💕 #GoogleDiagnosis"
6 months ago
Share →: I googled my symptoms and it turns out I just need this election to be over.

Commentary:
"Who needs WebMD when you have Google for diagnosis? 😂 Just remember, voting is the best medicine for your election-related symptoms! 🗳️ #ElectionFever"
6 months ago
Share →: I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

Commentary:
"Googling symptoms: the ultimate rollercoaster ride between 'It's just allergies' and 'Guess I'm a ghost now' 👻🤧 #DrGoogleSays"
6 months ago
Share →: I know that we aren’t supposed to self diagnose but I’ve googled all of my symptoms and I’m fairly sure I’m a raccoon.

Commentary:
🦝 "Looks like someone's been spending a bit too much time in the trash… or maybe just on the internet! It's all fun and games until you start getting the sudden urge to hoard shiny objects, right? Stay paw-sitive, my friend! 😉"

For even more funny googled quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny googled quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,970

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,970

45 minutes ago

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

You’re not stuck in traffic. You are traffic.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Everybody is fighting a battle that you don’t know about, because of the first rule of Fight Club.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

At a certain age, all you really want is a good mattress.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

All my life lessons were learned by watching people who took my advice.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

I am an influencer. If you aren’t influenced in any way, that is on you. Do better.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

If I was a weather man, I’d leak the weather early to pretty women.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose.

Shared recently on Slack:

“Real Housewives” is a great oxymoron because nothing about them is real.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

Spotted on YouTube:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I am physically, mentally and emotionally ready to enter a new phase in my life…. hibernation.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

Going viral on TikTok:

If you see me looking zoned out, it’s because I’m having a therapy session with myself in my head.

Making waves on Instagram:

An air mattress is the best way to tell your houseguests not to stay too long.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Kinda sucks that I actually own a skeleton but don’t get to show anyone until I die.

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