Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Apologies for the delays. The suitcase smashing machine has broken down, so we’re having to smash suitcases by hand.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Hello, I’m looking for the people who said “I’ll always be there for you”. Has anyone seen them?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

Does anyone play Trivial Pursuit anymore, or did it retire with the encyclopedias?

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

If you find me offensive, then I suggest you quit finding me.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

I am grateful for my experiences. I just didn’t need them all.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

The week between Christmas and New Year’s should be studied as it is clearly a wormhole, disturbing time and space.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Girls ask for help to open a jar, but can throw a couch during an argument.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Patience and forbearance are those qualities you develop when there are too many witnesses.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Job posting: $15/hr for master’s degree. Burrito menu: $23 for bean and cheese burrito.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,378

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I can admit that I am intrigued by people weirder than I am.

Spotted on X:

Main difference between me and my jokes is that folks don’t laugh at my jokes.

Shared recently on TikTok:

The sound of a buzzing fly is enough to ruin my whole mood.

Just landed via TikTok:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The other day, I got the crazy idea to see if I could still do a cartwheel. I can’t.

Trending via Slack:

I’m terrified of escalators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them.

Just shared via Twitch:

There is no physical evidence to say that today is Tuesday, we all just have to trust that someone kept count since the first one ever.

Trending via YouTube:

I feel bad for those that don’t enjoy their own company. I be having a ball by myself.

Just landed via Slack:

Why are people always so scared of self-checkouts when shopping? It’s much quicker and you always get something for free.

Seen just now on Slack:

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Funny guests quotes

Funny guests quotes bring all the laughs 😂 and awkward moments 🤣 when visitors drop by unannounced or stay a little too long! Whether it’s quirky behavior, unexpected requests, or hilarious misunderstandings, these gems capture the wild side of hospitality 🏡. Ready to smile and relate? Let’s dive into the funniest things guests have ever said and remind ourselves that sometimes, guests bring the real party 🎉!

New funny guests quotes 👇

All funny guests quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

75 shares on Messenger this month:

I’ve tasted long-term relationships, I’ve tasted casual dating. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 9 p.m. ..!

76 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t think people are actually getting any dumber. I think stupid people have just become way more confident.

35 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Girls be like, “I know a spot,” then sacrifice you under the full moon.

42 shares on Discord this month:

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

62 shares on TikTok this month:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your card out of your wallet.

83 shares on Reddit this month:

A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do all day.

98 shares on Slack this month:

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

36 shares on Pinterest this month:

Oops, I think I’ve had a little too much to think.

98 shares on WeChat this month:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

15 shares on Facebook this month:

Trying is the first step toward failure.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know much, but I know this: the older you get, the faster the number of things you’re willing to wait in line for approaches zero.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Once I see a vein on your forehead while we arguing, I’ll let you be.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying things like, “That’s a pretty building.”

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Everybody thinks “Free Hugs” signs are cute, unless you’re a boa constrictor.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t have read receipts on my phone because why would I tell on myself like that?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Waffles are just pancakes with convenient boxes to hold your syrup.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. Show them you can’t.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not sure how long my body can handle this “getting out of bed early in the morning” nonsense.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,322

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

My kids act like they’re afraid of monsters, when they are literally the most terrifying creatures I’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

I’m not sure my body can handle much more of this “getting out of bed” nonsense.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

The term “bisexual” is so confusing. Are you sexual twice a week or once every other week?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Noam Chomsky sounds like the legal name of the very hungry caterpillar.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

As a kid, I was worried about randomly disappearing into the Bermuda Triangle forever. As an adult, I’m wondering how I can actually make that happen.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

Imagine Pinocchio roasting you for 5 mins straight and his nose didn’t move an inch.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

People say that they want to be tall, but don’t realize how many times tall people are assaulted by spiderwebs.

Just shared via TikTok:

Major cheat code in life: ask for the big, unreasonable thing. The universe meets you at your level of audacity.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Spent the day decorating the house for Christmas and my wife spent the day re-decorating the house for Christmas.

Shared recently on Messenger:

If she doesn’t post you, take her phone, go live and introduce yourself!

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Check yourself before you Shrek yourself.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

Going viral on Threads:

Putting my Christmas tree up today. Big day for my cats.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Play the long game? You mean Monopoly?

Trending via Pinterest:

What do you mean a baguette isn’t a female bag?

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