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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Your honor, my client doesn’t like jail.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

A person becomes 10 times more attractive not by their looks but by photoshop.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

I will never understand why our washing machines feel the need to lie about how much time is left. If you need more time, just let me know, that’s fine.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I will never fall victim to groupthink. I have perfectly unique opinions that no one else has, and they are the dumbest nonsense you’ve ever heard.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Saturday nights are for watching zombie shows and dreaming about the apocalypse.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2402 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,564

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,564

Updated

46 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Telegram:

Unsolicited sandwich pics.

Broadcasted on X:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

Just shared via YouTube:

Grocery carts should have barcode scanners on them so you can see how much you’re spending as you put things in your cart.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Raising a teenager is like nailing pudding to the wall.

Making waves on Slack:

Got kicked out of reincarnation club for yelling yolo.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Thank you for your password, now we are going to text you another password, then put that one in. Click ‘remember this computer’ so we can forget it.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

Shared recently on Slack:

“You’re so quick to cut someone off!” God forbid a girl actually has self-respect.

Going viral on Facebook:

There’s something meditative about cleaning. It’s the perfect time to reflect and plan revenge on every single person who has ever wronged you.

Home » Funny King Size Bed Quotes

Funny king size bed quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2402 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,564

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,564

Updated

46 minutes ago

Users Online

3,450

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a car.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

It’s difficult to play hard to get when I’m already hard to want.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up, we had to manually roll up our car windows.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Is it okay for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school, or am I just a terrible teacher?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

Hate it when my mouth says something my brain was trying to keep quiet.

Live now on Reddit:

I think my type is a nice person.

Shared recently on X:

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

Just landed via Threads:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Reported on Instagram:

If you find my upper lip mole sexy, wait till you see the dark spot on my MRI.

Making waves on Instagram:

Shaved my bush and went down a pants size.

Spotted on Reddit:

I always work very hard and intensively to ensure that my wife can proudly say: “That idiot over there? Yes, that’s mine!”

Broadcasted on WeChat:

And to my grandchildren, I leave my unread PDFs.

Spotted on WeChat:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, I’m never sending you nudes again.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

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