Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

All kids are born with a sixth sense that lets them know the absolute worst time to ask for something.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

The sound of rain outside when you’re in bed is elite.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

As a retiree, I have two pairs of pajamas. Bedtime and daytime. Sometimes I get them confused.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

You gotta be careful: don’t say a word to nobody about nothing anytime ever.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

1994: I can’t wait to see what the world is like in 30 years. 2024: God no.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

My therapist said cutting people off isn’t healthy. She’s next.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Aging gracefully is like getting steamrolled gracefully, you should really be screaming.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,564

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

What, and I cannot stress this enough, day is it.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

Making waves on Telegram:

In America we have marijuana. In France they have oui’d.

Seen just now on X:

I’m going back to the 90s, if anyone wants to come.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Remember, when a package says “sharing size”, that’s just a guideline. They have no enforcement mechanism.

Going viral on WeChat:

On the upside, my kids are helping with the dishes. On the downside, my kids are helping with the dishes.

Going viral on WeChat:

Fall fashion: where we all transform into stylish, toasty marshmallows!

Just landed via Facebook:

“I hate small talk!” Oh okay. Do you think all your grandparents are going to heaven?

Spotted on Reddit:

I miss when 1K was a lot of money.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Girls … I understood why they advise us to get married and have kids before 25. Because after that, our brain starts working, and the decision won’t seem so reasonable anymore.

Funny merge quotes

Funny merge quotes bring a splash of humor to the often tricky world of combining ideas, projects, or even playlists! 😂✨ Whether you’re coding, collaborating, or just blending life’s little moments, these witty gems make the process way more fun. Ready to laugh through the chaos and celebrate those perfectly imperfect unions? Let’s dive into some laughs that merge creativity with comedy! 🎉🤹‍♂️💡

New funny merge quotes 👇

All funny merge quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

67 shares on TikTok this month:

If you want to impress me with your car, it should be an ice cream van.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

As someone who was born in August, I find the word leotard extremely offensive.

44 shares on Telegram this month:

Sometimes I wish I could turn down the volume on certain people.

92 shares on Facebook this month:

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

77 shares on Reddit this month:

Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

I refuse to listen to anyone give commentary on the state of society unless it’s in a TikTok video filmed inside their car.

11 shares on Slack this month:

Nighty night! Don’t let the horror of existence bite.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

Aliens are gonna be super confused when they show up threatening to overthrow our leaders and we’re all stoked and offer to help.

12 shares on Slack this month:

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

20 shares on Instagram this month:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s difficult to play hard to get when I’m already hard to want.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I like to put “No DMs” in my bio to pretend that I’m attractive.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Stress in private, complain on Twitter, happy in public.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate Valentine’s Day but I do enjoy infant archery.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,431

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Apparently, the job interviewer doesn’t like it when your biggest weakness is beautiful Latinas.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, I am not nonchalant, I will set myself on fire.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

“Easy like Sunday morning” is something people with no kids say.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who turns every black shirt into an abstract deodorant mural.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

My dad’s handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Sex is cool but have you ever had your bed all to yourself.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

How can people lift weights? My arms get tired just by putting my hair up in a ponytail.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

If you don’t have at least one white friend named “Matt”, then you are Matt.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Coughing has finally overtaken speaking Arabic as the most taboo thing to do in an airport.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Reddit:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now.

Making waves on Facebook:

Wine drunk doesn’t even make itself known. You’re just relaxed, and then, all of a sudden, you feel sexier.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

If you tell me to watch until the end, the end better be in five seconds.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I never had kids because little kids see too many ghosts and that’s something I’d rather not know about.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Relationship status: nobody is cheating on me so that’s pretty neat.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Life is short, unless you’re listening to a kid describing an episode of PAW Patrol.

Going viral on Slack:

My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

Googling “effect vs affect” in an incognito window.

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