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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

It was the kind of movie that kept you on the edge of your seat, waiting for something interesting to happen.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

You can’t argue with me because I’ll just agree with you until you leave.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

No time like now to start “flossing regularly” before tomorrow’s dental appointment.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I really don’t care what happens to me romantically anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Starting drama with me the week before my period is an absolutely terrible idea – for you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,385

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

Everything is about sex except Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is about power.

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

My four moods: I’m too old for doing that. I’m too tired for doing that. I’m too sober for doing that. I don’t have time for doing that.

Shared recently on WeChat:

An orgasm before bed is nature’s strongest sleep aid.

Just shared via Slack:

You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there’s a luxury tax, and rich people can go to jail.

Trending via Discord:

Clothes too dirty for the closet, but too clean for laundry. Welcome to: the chair.

Seen just now on X:

Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

My lawyer dropped his briefcase and nunchuks fell out.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My first mistake of my life was my birth.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The concept of warding off vampires with crosses is so interesting to me. I wonder if it applies to any other religion or if they’re allergic to just Catholicism.

Funny Nativity quotes

Funny Nativity quotes bring a hilarious twist to the classic Christmas story 🎄🤣 Whether you’re looking to spice up your holiday cards or just need a good laugh during the festive season, these witty lines capture the joy and silliness of the nativity scene 👶✨ Get ready to share some chuckles and spread the holiday cheer with laughs as bright as the star on top! 🌟😂

New funny Nativity quotes 👇

All funny Nativity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on Pinterest this month:

Every time you rub your eyes, they should change color a little.

81 shares on Facebook this month:

Naps are tricky. Either you wake up relaxed and refreshed, or you have a headache, a dry throat and no idea what year it is.

61 shares on Threads this month:

FaceTiming me is for platinum members only.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

I wish I was a cat. No bills, no job, just meow, meow.

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I enjoy long, romantic walks … to the departure gate.

84 shares on WhatsApp this month:

In my 20s: I’m gonna live forever! In my 40s: uh oh!

26 shares on Pinterest this month:

I haven’t cleaned my shower in so long, it’s becoming a terrarium. Absolutely gorgeous.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

“Stop talking about old drama!” God forbid a girl and her bestie enjoy their history lessons.

90 shares on Messenger this month:

In high school I was voted “most likely to hold a grudge” and I’m still mad about it.

86 shares on X this month:

I’m not here to offend anyone; I’m here to offend everyone.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Awake? You may be entitled to compensation.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Proverbs are so mean. Like, I don’t deserve any worm because I woke up at 11am? Like, no worm at all?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Any day now, there will be a child born and named Labubu.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you ever eat a properly salted meal and suddenly understand why the ancient Romans were willing to be paid in salt?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If I had a boyfriend, I’d put him in a snow globe and shake it really hard.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I Knew Better, But I Did It Anyway: A Memoir

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,278

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

The greatest trick ever was making people feel more connected, when they are actually more alone than ever.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

If we were subway rats, I’d share my pizza crust with you.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Super excited about a brand new year full of questionable life choices.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m glad I have boobs. The last thing I need is people making eye contact with me.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

I was the most patient parent and then I had kids.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Blowing kisses to my coworkers so that nobody talks to me today.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

My psych professor asked if we’d heard of Pavlov. I said, “It rings a bell.” No one laughed; I’m too witty for this class.

Going viral on Reddit:

Everyone’s gangsta until they spot a double rainbow in the sky.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I refuse to go to a blood bank. I’m not taking your blood money.

Freshly posted on Threads:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

Just shared via Instagram:

I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.

Breaking via WeChat:

Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. It will never bring you true happiness or fulfillment. Also, it’s a felony.

Just landed via WeChat:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

Breaking via Facebook:

If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

Just shared via Threads:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Shared recently on Facebook:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴