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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Can’t think of a single time the MGM lion advanced the plot of the movie in any way. Just needless jump scare.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Men look so amazing for people who use the same product for their teeth, hair, floor and car washing.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I told myself I’d behave today. Then I saw my reflection and thought, maybe tomorrow.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Whoever thinks money doesn’t buy happiness can deposit it in my bank account.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

People will be like “there is no right or wrong way to do it” until you do it the wrong way.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,430

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I bought some coconut shampoo today. I got halfway home before I thought, “I don’t even have a coconut!”

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I wonder if the sun also takes pictures of humanity going down?

Going viral on Facebook:

I once let a really short guy be the big spoon and it felt like I went to bed with a backpack on.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

Live now on Telegram:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

A moth flies into your face out of nowhere. You could ask him why he does that, but what would you do with the information?

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

An introvert walked into a bar. Just kidding. The introvert stayed home.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Meetings are great because who doesn’t like being held hostage?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I should’ve been an air conditioner because all I do is vent.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

Countries are just gangs with paperwork.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Ever since I began sharing dad jokes, my followers have doubled in sighs.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

My savings account has been empty for so long that a Spirit Halloween just opened up inside it.

Spotted on WeChat:

I really don’t believe all of these women are actually named “Sassy”

Spotted on Messenger:

So many people to disappoint, so little time.

Going viral on Twitch:

Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Spotted on Messenger:

Bacon should be free for anyone having a bad day.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Making waves on Discord:

I feel like a wildlife photographer when I spend hours trying to capture my teenager’s smile.

Seen just now on Threads:

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I would prefer not to.

Reported on X:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

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