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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

I should’ve existed as a tree.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

My psych professor asked if we’d heard of Pavlov. I said, “It rings a bell.” No one laughed; I’m too witty for this class.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I love when someone is telling a story and you can tell even from their version that they’re the villain.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

My red flag is that I don’t make playlists on Spotify. I just add every song I’ve ever liked to the ‘Liked Songs’ playlist and shuffle that, like an iPod.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

There are only two kinds of people, and I avoid them both.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Every ‘c’ in ‘Pacific Ocean’ is pronounced differently.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

429 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,698

Funny Quotes Topics

17,716

Funny Quotes Images

15,698

Updated

Jan 13, 2026

Users Online

3,417

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

I love it when God gives me money.

Going bananas on X:

I asked my dad what his favorite joke was. He said, “I can’t pick a favorite. I love you and your sister equally!”

Spotted on X:

My New Year’s resolution will be to stop chasing waterfalls, and stick to the rivers and the lakes that I’m used to.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

No matter how much Polynesian food you eat, you always want Samoa.

Spotted on Slack:

Gatekeeping how insanely handsome I am by looking like total shit all the time.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Hobbies include being misunderstood.

Shared recently on WeChat:

After my funeral, I want one of my friends to take my phone and text everyone, “Thanks for coming.”

Trending via X:

I don’t understand why banks get so mad when you can’t pay back your loan. You already knew I had no money when I came to borrow it.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I wouldn’t walk 500 miles, and then walk 500 more.

Making waves on Instagram:

“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Funny parkour quotes

Funny parkour quotes add a playful spin to the thrilling world of urban movement and stunts. 🏃‍♂️😆 From witty remarks about daring jumps to humorous takes on parkour fails, these quotes celebrate the lighter side of jumping and climbing. Enjoy a laugh and appreciate the fun in the art of parkour! 😂🏙️

New funny parkour quotes 👇

All funny parkour quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m now at the age where sitting cross-legged on the floor is punishable by about three days of full-body paralysis.

29 shares on Snapchat this month:

Your phone is a casino designed to steal your time.

28 shares on TikTok this month:

I can do a lot of things, but listening to someone chew is not one of them.

92 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Don’t be coming into my house and causing big spikes of cortisol.

85 shares on Discord this month:

The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.

79 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t do “casual.” I’m like an 18th-century vampire. When I fall in love, my devotion is boundless and eternal.

36 shares on X this month:

Welcome to Twitter, where people never let their lack of knowledge get in the way of expressing a strong opinion.

75 shares on Threads this month:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

66 shares on Facebook this month:

Statistically speaking, on average, a person has two arms, two legs, one testicle, and one ovary.

94 shares on Pinterest this month:

Netflix subtitles be like “speaking foreign language”. Bro, translate it!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re in his DMs, so am I, but I am way funnier.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Knowing a guy who knows a guy is one of the most valuable things in the entire world.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Walking on egg shells? In this economy?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You can be under 25, just don’t do it around me.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

You are why Superman costumes have warning labels telling you the costume won’t make you fly.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

King Kong should’ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

429 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,698

Funny Quotes Topics

17,716

Funny Quotes Images

15,698

Updated

Jan 13, 2026

Users Online

3,570

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

I poked your tweet with a stick, hoping it would do something.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Just realized when I get a partner, that means my family is gonna know that I have feelings.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

I’ve got the nativity scene facing the TV, so baby Jesus can watch “Die Hard.”

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

“I’m asking Santa to bring some of you a sense of humor for Christmas.”

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

(Talking to myself) I just don’t know what to tell you.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Being an adult is mumbling ‘this is stupid’ as you reluctantly slide out of bed.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

I can’t wait to open my phone tomorrow and find out what we’re mad about next.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

Just landed via WeChat:

I’m not like other girls. I don’t have a podcast.

Breaking via X:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Just landed via YouTube:

Commenting “This could be us” on her pics with her boyfriend.

Seen just now on Facebook:

A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

Spotted on X:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I hope “be the light you want to see in the world” doesn’t refer to Molotov Cocktails.

Just landed via Telegram:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as for 31 days? Where is my change?

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I was at the cemetery when a little kid walked up to me and said she was afraid. I took her hand and told her that I used to be afraid too… when I was alive.

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