Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

“Some men go months without being hugged.” Okay, then they should just hug each other.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

I wish I could just drop my body off at the gym and pick it up later.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Y’all made fun of Plankton on Spongebob for dating a computer, and look at y’all now.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Venn diagrams. You either love ‘em or you hate ‘em. Or you’re somewhere in the middle.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

Twitter is an abusement park.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

It’s legally required that you lose a frisbee onto the roof within one week of purchase.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Being smart is a curse. You see the game, the lies, the patterns, but you still gotta play dumb to survive.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

The peace of not knowing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,283

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Another day of waking up cute instead of wealthy, so I guess I have to go to work.

Trending via X:

Gravestone inscription: “Hey guys, I’m going to be taking a little break from social media”

Going viral on TikTok:

Breaking news: Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake.

Trending via LinkedIn:

At this point, I’m sure I’ll meet an alien or zombies before I meet the love of my life!

Seen just now on Twitch:

In a job interview, you can always respond to an awkward question with a deep gaze and parted lips, followed by “You complete me.”

Shared recently on Slack:

The only men you can trust is ramen.

Just shared via Slack:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Trending via Messenger:

The book characters may be fictional, but my emotional instability over them is real.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Twitter needs a button that’s “bring back that tweet I was just starting to read before you automatically refreshed.”

Funny plastic surgeon quotes

Funny plastic surgeon quotes 💉😄 bring a hilarious twist to the world of beauty and transformations! Whether you’re curious about the magic behind the makeover or just love clever medical humor, these witty lines will have you laughing through every nip and tuck. Ready for some cheeky charm and clever quips? Let’s dive into the lighter side of surgery with a smile! 😜✨

New funny plastic surgeon quotes 👇

All funny plastic surgeon quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Telegram this month:

I wish I could turn everyone I love into a trinket, so I can keep them forever, because I am greedy and selfish.

95 shares on X this month:

Spotify Wrapped has a special talent for pulling up an artist I’ve literally never heard of and telling me I actually listen to them 2,000 times per day.

69 shares on Slack this month:

Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

44 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

28 shares on Threads this month:

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

50 shares on Discord this month:

I’m done with self-care. Time to learn some spells.

29 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

Sleep when the baby sleeps, eat when the baby eats, work when the baby works.

84 shares on Twitch this month:

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

86 shares on Messenger this month:

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s no reason to be bored flying on an airplane. Use the time to tell the person next to you your entire life story.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Y’all aren’t taking beautiful women to jazz clubs anymore, and that’s the problem.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Micro-dosing time travel by going to bed.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Are they honking at me because I’m cute or because I can’t drive.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

When I was a kid, we weren’t allowed to use our phones in school. Mainly because the cords wouldn’t reach.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,413

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

My New Years resolutions are to do some things, and stop doing some other things.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Who’s your favorite horror director? Mine’s God.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Beavers are also just otters that have learned carpentry.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Are you http? Because I’m :// without you.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

This cop is parked illegally behind me with his lights on. I’m going to say something.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Her heart is a combination of wildflowers and wildfires, delicate, yet so fierce.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Discord:

When you want to feel at your thinnest, walk through Walmart at any time of day.

Breaking via TikTok:

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth 2300 words.

Going viral on Reddit:

When you’re a parent, your skincare routine is just the steam from the dishwasher when you open it to find the coffee cup you just needed.

Spotted on X:

I love when men remind me I’m evil because sometimes I be thinking I’m losing my spark.

Just shared via Instagram:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Sunday is my favorite day where I pretend I’m going to do something productive.

Going bananas on Discord:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Going viral on Twitch:

Whenever someone says “Per ChatGPT” or “ChatGPT says,” I look at them like they just consulted a magic 8 ball because, please, stop playing with me.

Going viral on Reddit:

That annoying moment when you’re texting someone and autocorrect decides to join the conversation.

Seen just now on TikTok:

My dentist said my teeth were stained and asked if I smoke or drink coffee? I said, “I drink it.”

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