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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

My goal for next month is small, simple, and clear: change my whole entire life.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

If I were a category, I’d be “miscellaneous.”

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Sports bars exist. There should be bars for monitoring the situation.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Jump to recipe is the closest thing we have to teleportation.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

I don’t understand why banks get so mad when you can’t pay back your loan. You already knew I had no money when I came to borrow it.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

When you’re feeling down, just turn up the music a little louder.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,542

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

“I’ve tasted going back to an ex, and I’ve tasted trying to fix a relationship before it breaks. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 10 p.m.”

Just landed via TikTok:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Just shared via WeChat:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

If hot showers aren’t good for you then why do I emerge from them bright red like a beautiful ruby?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

“People you may know” and it’s someone I would set on fire.

Just shared via Facebook:

Googling “effect vs affect” in an incognito window.

Trending via Telegram:

The fastest mammal on earth is the smartass on the web.

Going bananas on Discord:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

Live now on Snapchat:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at intimacy.

Funny q3 quotes

New funny q3 quotes 👇

Congrats on hitting your Q3 numbers. Here’s an even bigger Q4 number that you’ll be fired for missing.

0

3 months ago

bigger, business, congrats, deadline, even, fired, firing, hitting, humor, missing, number, numbers, performance, pressure, q3, Q3 number, q4, Q4 number, work

Someone from 🇮🇱 has recently bookmarked this quote.

74 shares on Slack this month.

All funny q3 quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Reddit this month:

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.

56 shares on Twitch this month:

The cheapest way to fly is off the handle.

98 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Cheesecake dislikers are attention seekers.

88 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s hard to sleep knowing that Coke is in the fridge.

85 shares on WeChat this month:

“It could be drugs,” I tell myself as I buy more books.

19 shares on X this month:

Love low-hanging fruit. Easiest kind to obtain, in my opinion.

51 shares on WeChat this month:

Probably the worst thing about pyramid schemes is how they make you advertise to all your friends and family that you are part of a pyramid scheme.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

56 shares on WeChat this month:

When someone has “Do Not Disturb” on, it’s like, oh, okay, I didn’t realize the great philosopher was in their hour of seclusion. Pardon me for even daring to enter their precious mind palace.

20 shares on WeChat this month:

Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Twitter is Iike the smoking area for social media.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

My girlfriend wants us to try couples counseling and I said we should use my therapist because he already knows what’s wrong with her.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Massage therapist asked how I felt about chiropractics and I told her the guy who invented it says he learned it from a ghost, and that shut the conversation down pretty quick.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

I will never forget how to spell bananas, thanks to Gwen Stefani.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I’ll kill the vibe, so you don’t have to.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

People can’t drive you crazy if you don’t give them the keys.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

If history is repeating itself, when can I buy a pet dinosaur?

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Yes, we absolutely can push our meeting to sometime after the new year, or mid-March, or the year after next, or never.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

WhatsApp shouldn’t just display “seen”, but also “lies” and “also writes with other girls”!

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Anyone else smile at old people just to show that you’re one of the good ones.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Time is precious, waste it wisely.

Making waves on X:

Yeah, Instagram is bad for our mental health, but what about Outlook?

Just landed via Pinterest:

If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

Trending via YouTube:

Hulk Hogan’s gone, so I’ll be ripping shirts and screaming “BROTHERRR!” at strangers in his honor.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I love cute tiny purses, but I’m sad to say I can never be a cute tiny purse girl. I need to haul my hoard of objects everywhere I go, because what if….

Just landed via Snapchat:

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

Making waves on Threads:

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

Just landed via X:

Nothing brings neighbors together like a few cops cars in front of another neighbor’s house that no one likes.

Breaking via Instagram:

If you think voting is pointless wait until you hear about writing posts here.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny q3 quotes

New funny q3 quotes 👇

Congrats on hitting your Q3 numbers. Here’s an even bigger Q4 number that you’ll be fired for missing.

All funny q3 quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨