Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Alexa, tell Roomba to get the spider.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Adulting is difficult. One minute you’re proud of yourself, the next minute you feel like you’re not doing enough.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Praying none of y’all are unwrapping podcast equipment.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

“You’ve changed!” Yeah, I don’t like you.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Getting road rage alone in my house.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,542

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Just landed via Pinterest:

You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

Trending via Facebook:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Before I start seeing a psychiatrist, does anyone like me crazy?

Just shared via Twitch:

Old people get so mad when you’re young and tired.

Just shared via Twitch:

The healthy food in my fridge should be grateful really. It survives much longer than everything else.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If I were a mouse and I lived in Moscow, I would think, haha, I live in Mousecow!

Funny rebrand quotes

New funny rebrand quotes 👇

Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

19 hours ago

bit, gender, gender role, guy, humor, just, little, male, metrosexual, performative, performative male, rebrand, role, say, sexuality, slang, stereotype, straight, straight guy

All funny rebrand quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on WeChat this month:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

88 shares on Facebook this month:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

34 shares on Reddit this month:

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

25 shares on Instagram this month:

Enjoy the time between diapers!

27 shares on Facebook this month:

My ability to remember song lyrics from the ’90s far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the garage.

15 shares on X this month:

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

81 shares on Discord this month:

They should invent a type of situation that improves.

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

I hate it when I turn on the car in the morning and the music starts blasting… It’s like, woah, I’m not the same person I was last night.

44 shares on Facebook this month:

I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

I’m looking for insults so intelligent you don’t realize you’ve been roasted until three thoughts later.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Mocktails are awesome because they ask the question ‘how much could juice cost?’

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Accordion to a recent survey, inserting musical instruments into sentences largely goes unnoticed.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

I will trust someone on Reddit from 11 years ago with my life before using ChatGPT for anything.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Super excited for a brand new week of hoping for the best, but expecting the worst.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Growing up means choosing cozy couch moments over crowded club scenes. Cheers to adulting!

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My kids asked me what games I used to play on my iPad as a kid. I told them I used to speak into a fan to sound like a robot.

Shared recently on X:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Making waves on X:

You don’t see people giving bunny ears in photos anymore.

Just landed via WeChat:

Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

Making waves on X:

Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down after being told to calm down.

Broadcasted on Slack:

I was explaining to my Ukrainian colleague the phrase ‘There’s no such thing as a free lunch’. She told me the equivalent in Ukrainian is ‘The only free cheese is in the mousetrap’ — which is so much better.

Going viral on Threads:

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Just shared via Twitch:

Reverse cowgirl is not a fair trade because, why do you get a view of my sexy back, and all I’m seeing are your toes throwing gang signs?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Old people are right about crosswords and morning stretches, I will admit.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny rebrand quotes

New funny rebrand quotes 👇

Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

All funny rebrand quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨