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New funny quotes: 56 this month

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Updated: Mar 13, 2026

 

 

 

 

Funny voicemail quotes

Funny voicemail quotes bring a splash of laughter 🎉 to your callers’ day while you’re away 📞. Whether you want to keep things lighthearted 😄 or add a quirky twist 🤪, these witty lines turn a simple voicemail into a memorable moment. Ready to make your inbox the life of the party? 🎊 Let’s dive into the funniest ways to say “I’m not here right now!” 😂

I always leave my friends voicemails in case they suddenly decide to be a musician and need an interlude.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

My favorite voicemails are those where the person doesn’t leave one.

Posted onJan 29, 2026

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Posted onJan 28, 2026

Called myself to see if I’d answer, sent me to voicemail. Twice.

Posted onJan 28, 2026

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

Posted onJan 23, 2026

Hilarious when peoples outgoing voicemail message says they “can’t make it to the phone right now.” You carry the phone with you. It’s the only constant in your life.

Posted onJan 22, 2026

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