Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Donnie Darko was also ahead of its time because the guy’s haunted by a giant Labubu.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Parallel parking: where true relationships are tested!

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

We have now entered the void (25th December to 31st December).

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

ChatGPT, what do you do when you find out your boyfriend’s been using ChatGPT to write you messages?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Caffeine: the adult version of fairy dust.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI take a 30-minute poop right after clocking in.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

If you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. But if you teach a man to fish, you’ll get the house to yourself on Saturdays.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

My brain is 80% song lyrics.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,407

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

I’m a kid at heart and a senior citizen at my knees and back.

Trending via Messenger:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Trending via Messenger:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Just landed via Reddit:

If I climbed all the way to the top of Mount Everest and looked up, then I’d finally see the top of our family’s weekly laundry pile.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

Making waves on Slack:

The older I get, no.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched the argument I baited you with.

Broadcasted on Slack:

I hate everyone in front of me at this checkout line, everyone behind me is cool.

Funny weather prediction quotes

Funny weather prediction quotes bring a splash of humor 🌦️ to those unpredictable forecast moments! Whether it’s rain, shine, or a surprise snowstorm ❄️, these witty remarks lighten the mood and make checking the weather way more entertaining 🌈. Perfect for sharing with friends or brightening up a gloomy day, get ready to smile 😄 and maybe even rethink your umbrella game! ☂️

New funny weather prediction quotes 👇

All funny weather prediction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on X this month:

I spend half the day wondering if it’s too late for coffee and the other half wondering if it’s too early for alcohol.

61 shares on Discord this month:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

37 shares on Threads this month:

A car window made specifically for a dog to stick its head out of is called a sunwoof.

35 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I had no social life in high school. Even my imaginary best friend had a date for the prom.

95 shares on X this month:

Right now somebody’s therapist is hearing about YOU.

70 shares on Threads this month:

You ever have your knees crack so good that you expect them to glow in the dark. Yeah, me too.

65 shares on Slack this month:

As a childless adult, it is my duty to embrace hobbies and pastimes that my peers cannot, as they have sacrificed their free time to maintain the population. I must vibe and chill, and do fun things, in their honor.

42 shares on YouTube this month:

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

Welcome to your 40s. A random back pain will be assigned to you shortly, and you’ll never know what flares it up every time.

77 shares on Messenger this month:

Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine if you spent all your time studying, actually studying.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Flour company: What if we sell it in a paper bag that’s not fully sealed at the bottom?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not here to offend anyone; I’m here to offend everyone.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The problem with “treat yourself” is that I don’t know how to stop. I had a bad day in March, and I’ve been treating myself ever since.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked, whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My soulmate probably seen my posts and deleted me.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Ginger ale is the champagne of soda.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I have no beef with vegetarians.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

At the club asking for Ibuprofen.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,378

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Telling the guy next to me on the subway that I’m not even ticklish, so don’t bother trying.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

The egg doesn’t swim to the sperm, girl. Never chase a man.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Don’t give up on your dreams. If cauliflower can be pizza and zucchini can be noodles, you too can be anything you want.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Do you mind if I become the object of your desire? No worries if not.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

“I’ll run it by the boss” is one of the peak boomerisms you can say as a married man. It feels electric.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

If you don’t like me, remember: it’s mind over matter. I don’t mind, and you don’t matter.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

All the stops on the bus are pointless, except the one I’m getting off at.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Adulthood is wild. One day I’m transferring money to my savings account, and three days later, I’m transferring it out to save myself.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

My whole life, I never read a warning label telling me not to eat laundry detergent or put glue in my hair, somehow I just knew.

Trending via Threads:

Yeah, I have a drinking problem. It’s called dehydration.

Shared recently on Threads:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Text her when the moon looks pretty.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Keep your fries close and your onion rings closer.

Shared recently on X:

I eat my first meal of the day in the afternoon, bro. Don’t ask me for advice.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

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