Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I have a drawer in my kitchen that I can’t open anymore because of that one time I decided to put a spatula in it.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

If I were a higher power, and people were doing evil in my name, I’d probably stop it … but that’s just me.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

This year felt like being awake during surgery.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

The Cranberries. Great band name. You pick a fruit and you get to work.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

I actually love talking to strangers, they will unknowingly say some shit that shifts your perspective, and you never see them again.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,507

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

Shared recently on Discord:

Landlord: I’m raising your rent. Me: Am I getting a bigger house?

Going viral on Pinterest:

You’d think, with the amount of overthinking I do, I’d make the right decision.

Spotted on WeChat:

I hate texting. Just hunt me like an animal.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I want to make fun of Kanye but I’m always losing my shit on the internet too.

Shared recently on Facebook:

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

Just landed via Twitch:

Living solo: where pants are optional, and snacks are unlimited.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Maybe the four horsemen of the apocalypse are Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Trending via Slack:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Funny wool quotes

Funny wool quotes are here to tickle your cozy side 🧶😄 Whether you’re a knitting newbie or a yarn enthusiast, these witty sayings will have you chuckling and maybe even snorting like a sheep 🐑🤣 Ready to wrap yourself in laughs as warm as your favorite sweater? Let’s unravel some woolly humor that’s sure to brighten your day! ✨🧵

New funny wool quotes 👇

All funny wool quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Twitch this month:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.

44 shares on Threads this month:

If you’re curious what the priciest item in a store is just bring a kid along because they’ll definitely find then break it.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

Life hack: put on an apron at home and people think you’re super busy doing important stuff even when you’re not.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

Can you imagine being a 7th grade girl and being able to see your crush’s bedroom during Zoom math class.

16 shares on Threads this month:

Single bells, single bells, single all the way. Oh, what fun it is to watch those couples fight all day, yay!

68 shares on TikTok this month:

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

61 shares on X this month:

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

100 shares on Pinterest this month:

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

70 shares on Snapchat this month:

If life was a video game, right now would be the time where I randomly press buttons because I don’t know what to do.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever been in the car with someone who drives so fast that you press your imaginary brakes on the passenger side?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

All strapless bras need to be taken off the shelves. A total recall. We do not have the technology yet.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know if I’m pregnant or what, but I’ve been craving 3 million dollars so bad.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t compare yourself with others. Everyone is better than you.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go, I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

“Is there anything else I can assist you with today?” No, just that one thing you couldn’t assist me with, thanks.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I deserve a love so pure that my nervous system can finally rest.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time a bird poops on my car, I eat a plate of wings on the front porch to show them what I’m capable of.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,492

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

I don’t understand how people use plastic wrap successfully.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

What are some beginner bad habits for someone just getting into ruining their life?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Me: This is a hard escape room. Manager: You’re at work.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

“Are you getting your period?” God forbid I’m just evil.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

“Boy, you made these perimenopausal ovaries come back to life,” – me flirting.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

I was about to stop overthinking, then I thought of a giraffe having a sore throat.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

If sex was real, I think I would’ve had it by now.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Thank you for being friends with me. Baffling decision, but thank you.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

My problem is, I wanna be the only one at the gym when I go.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Just shared via TikTok:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Trending via Facebook:

Typos keep me humble. Every email is a gamble.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

Going bananas on Threads:

Eating cookies left for Santa because the cowboy was a no show.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Quit keeping your enemies closer. No wonder you feel like shit.

Spotted on Discord:

Maybe one day a street will be named after me. Or a school. Or a mental hospital.

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