Funny hate quotes shine a light on the petty, irrational, and often hilarious things we find ourselves hating 🤪. From slow WiFi 📶 to loud chewers 🍽️, there’s no shortage of small annoyances that trigger big reactions 😂. These quotes capture the comedy in our over-the-top reactions to life’s little frustrations 🙃. Get ready to laugh at the things you love to hate — and admit that sometimes, your dramatic side takes over 😄!
New funny hate quotes
- Hate when I have to be mean. Why would you push a sweet girl this far?
- Hate Google’s Gemini. If I wanted to get misinformation from a Gemini, I’d talk to my mother.
- I hate it when I take a picture of myself and see 20 years of bad eating habits and no exercise.
- I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.
- One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.
- I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”
- I hate when cashiers feel the need to check if my money is real. If I could make counterfeit money, I wouldn’t be at the Dollar Tree, Karen.
- I’m officially at the age where I hate unnecessary noises and useless friends.
- Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”
- Hate it when my mouth says something my brain was trying to keep quiet.
Top funny hate quotes
- A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.
- I hate listening to a rapper that I used to adore, and they just don’t have it anymore.
- I hate when people tell me I need to “get out of my comfort zone,” like I don’t even have a comfort zone; I am literally always uncomfortable.
- I hate being responsible for my own meals because I’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day.
- I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.
- Hate it when my alarm goes off in the morning, and I’m still alive.
- Hate all political parties and you’ll never be disappointed.
- I hate it when I’m outside, and an insect lands and crawls on my glasses, and for a split second, I think aliens have invaded.
- I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.
- I hate when people call my phone! I don’t use it for that.
Popular funny hate quotes
- I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.
- I hate when a guy asks “can you cook?” Can you build a house?
- Nothing rattles me like the difference between rows and columns, man. I hate it so much.
- Stop blaming everyone for your problems. Pick one person you really hate and blame them for everything.
- Please don’t be mean to me, because I can be meaner and I hate being mean.
- Every time I have to leave the house and be around people I remember why I hate having to leave the house and be around people.
- We hate the same people and it’s so romantic.
- I hate how l am a “I have an appointment at 4pm so I can’t do anything all day” type of person.
- I hate when people ask me what I’m doing tomorrow, I don’t even know what I’m doing today.
- I hate it when I imagine how a conversation will go and then in the actual conversation the person goes off script. That’s not your line, man.
More funny hate quotes
- “I hate small talk!” Oh okay. Do you think all your grandparents are going to heaven?
- Men make it so easy to hate them.
- That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.
- I will always be hotter than everyone who hates me.
- For a girl that loves sleep and hates stress, my career choice is questionable.
- I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.
- Stop blaming everyone for all your problems. Pick one person you hate and blame them for everything.
- I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?
- I hate it when I go to hug someone sexy and hit my head on the mirror.
- I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.
Witty hate quotes
- I hate when people are like “you are so nice”. I’m ugly, I have no other choice.
- I hate when I offer someone food and they accept it.
- I hate when people stare at me and don’t say anything. I mean, if you want an autograph or a picture just ask.
- I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.
- I hate math, but I love counting money.
- Don’t hate me, date me!
- I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.
- I hated rats even before my girlfriend left me for one.
- Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.
- I hate when teachers put “?” on my work, like I don’t know either.
Funny hate quotes remind us that while hating stuff isn’t exactly healthy 🧠, it can definitely be funny 😂. Whether it’s hating mornings 🌅, Mondays 🗓️, or that one song stuck in your head 🎶, these moments of irrational dislike turn into comedy gold 🤣. These quotes are perfect for anyone who knows they can be just a little overdramatic sometimes 🙃. So embrace your petty dislikes, laugh at your overreactions, and enjoy the humor in harmless hate 🤪!