Funny sorry quotes highlight the awkward, dramatic, and often unnecessary ways we say “sorry” for everything 🤪. From apologizing when someone else bumps into us 🤷♂️ to over-apologizing for literally nothing 🙃, “sorry” often turns into a hilarious reflex 😂. These quotes capture the funny side of being overly polite, slightly guilty, and wonderfully awkward. Get ready to laugh at how we say sorry way more than we probably should 😄!
New funny sorry quotes
- Sorry, I’m late. I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind.
- Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.
- Sorry for acting weird. It’s just that I mirror people, and you were being weird first.
- If we get invaded by space aliens, I am immediately defecting to the alien side. Sorry.
- Sorry, I’m late. Time isn’t real, and I’m not convinced I am either.
- Sorry, I’m late. I found my old CD collection.
- Sorry, I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off because I didn’t set it, because I don’t want to be here.
- Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.
- Sorry it took so long to text you back; my social bandwidth was buffering.
- Oh, sorry, I can’t right now. I’m imagining some things and worrying about them.
Top funny sorry quotes
- My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”
- Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.
- Sorry, I laughed at your bad joke. I was trying to flirt.
- Sorry for the things I said when the internet was down for 10 minutes.
- I received a DM telling me that I’ve offended some of you. I’m truly sorry; I meant to offend all of you.
- Sorry, can’t. I’m too busy growing new neural pathways to make space for a stranger’s opinion. Evolution takes bandwidth, man.
- Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.
- Sorry for bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to bash my head into the walls anymore.
- Sorry for widening my eyes and whispering “The prophecy” when we first met.
- Sorry, I’m late. I sat on my bed in a towel for 45 minutes, staring at the wall.
Popular funny sorry quotes
- Sorry I zoned out during your story… my brain was offering me multiple side quests and overthinking opportunities.
- Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.
- Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.
- I’m sorry for inventing the universe.
- Sorry if my posts have any typos, it’s because I’m driving.
- Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.
- Sorry I’m late — I was standing in the shower, thinking about stuff.
- Sorry, but I don’t think we should see each other anymore. Your Katana skills are lacking.
- Sorry I’m late. It’s just because of who I am as a person.
- Sorry for my bad behavior. Mercury is in gatorade or whatever.
More funny sorry quotes
- I’m sorry for setting the impossible standards that the rest of you try to live up to.
- Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.
- I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.
- Oh, sorry about bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to slam my head into the walls anymore.
- Sorry, I’m late. I got here when I wanted to.
- Hey, sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come.
- I’m sorry, but when you call me ‘batshit crazy’ it’s almost starting to sound like you think it’s a bad thing!
- Sorry, the deadline for complaints was yesterday.
- Sorry I’m late, I got here as soon as I wanted to.
- I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.
Witty sorry quotes
- Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.
- Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.
- Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.
- I dunno what I did in a past life but holy crap I’m sorry.
- Sorry I’m unavailable… the horrors of reality insist upon themselves.
- I’m sorry, but I already have an A.I. boyfriend.
- Sorry, can’t. Waiting for my clothes to come back into style again.
- Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.
- Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.
- Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.
Funny sorry quotes remind us that while apologies are supposed to smooth things over 🕊️, they often add an extra layer of awkward comedy 😂. Whether it’s apologizing for your existence 🧍♀️, saying sorry just to fill silence 🔇, or sarcastic apologies that aren’t very sincere 🤣, “sorry” has become a language of its own. These quotes are perfect for anyone who can’t help but apologize for everything 🙃. So embrace the awkwardness, laugh at the endless sorries, and enjoy the funny side of constant apologies 🤪!