Funny Funny Quotes quotes

New funny quotes for all occasions. Updated regularly! 😉

Ripped a tag off my leggings and did not realize it was load-bearing.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

To whoever stole my oversized clock, you owe me big time.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Whoever said it was okay to let your pets sleep in your bed, thanks a lot, now my goldfish is dead.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

If you innocently act like you don’t know, people will explain dirty words to you and it’s hilarious.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Are you really a personal trainer or do you just want to wear shorts to work every day?

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re doing cardio.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Don’t worry, you’ll find the lost scissors when you’ll be searching for your glasses.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Autumn at last. Sitting on the sofa all day with a blanket and tea and watching movies. Just like in summer, but with a blanket and tea.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Dear God, thank you for the job I have. But if you have a lottery win planned for me, I’m ready! Thank you.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Rule #1 for family reunions: Always bring your own car so you can take off whenever you want.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Hug your children as often as you can. They can’t break things during this time.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024

Sleeping in is the most efficient way to find out which morning rituals you can actually do without.

Funny Quotes October 3, 2024