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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

It was so hot today, I thought I was going to be cremated.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

If “live each day as if it’s your last” means being paralyzed with anxiety and a sense of impending doom, then I am absolutely nailing it.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Guys, stop showering. I need the water for ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Can you put some pants on my voodoo doll and pop some money in the pocket, please?

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Stress in private, complain on Twitter, happy in public.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

I hate when you leave your phone on the side, and it brings up that red evil clock.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

The meeting of the Anonymous Pessimists was canceled. It wouldn’t have helped anyway.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,667

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Massage therapist asked how I felt about chiropractics and I told her the guy who invented it says he learned it from a ghost, and that shut the conversation down pretty quick.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

Spotted on X:

A genie that does my bidding would fix me.

Trending via YouTube:

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

Spotted on Telegram:

Sorry for texting you back instantly. My phone was in my hand, and I’m mature and actually like you.

Seen just now on Slack:

That awkward moment when you’re about to leave work and your boss says “before you go”.

Making waves on Threads:

It’s always a huge relief when I’m reading a list of symptoms of a deadly disease, and it says unexplained weight loss.

Spotted on TikTok:

The evening news: Where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it’s not.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Going viral on Discord:

One year closer to whatever age my obituary will say.

Funny 401k quotes

Funny 401k quotes 😂💼 bring a much-needed dose of humor to the serious world of retirement planning! Whether you’re stressing over savings or just need a chuckle while crunching numbers, these witty gems will make your financial journey a lot more enjoyable. Ready to laugh your way to a secure future? Let’s dive into some playful takes on that golden nest egg! 🐣💰🎉

New funny 401k quotes 👇

All funny 401k quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on YouTube this month:

If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

You’re a “haha” girl, and I’m an “lol” guy. It just wouldn’t work.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

10 shares on Reddit this month:

My child has entered the “Why?” stage of linguistic development, and I’ve realized I know absolutely nothing.

49 shares on Instagram this month:

I hate when cashiers feel the need to check if my money is real. If I could make counterfeit money, I wouldn’t be at the Dollar Tree, Karen.

44 shares on WeChat this month:

Unemployed folks always have esoteric knowledge, for some reason.

58 shares on WeChat this month:

If you need me, I’ll be in the shower pretending I can sing.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

God doesn’t do nearly enough smiting anymore.

91 shares on Telegram this month:

Having a dirty mind and an innocent face is truly a blessing.

28 shares on TikTok this month:

“Got milk?” Buddy, I don’t even have self-esteem.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Being the introverted hopeless romantic with a high sex drive is a curse.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

That incredible ability of cats to only throw up on carpeted floors.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a beautiful day to ignore your existing problems and create new ones.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

For Halloween, I’m going as an emotional roller coaster.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

69. Some might call it nasty. I call it a romantic dinner for 2.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

All I’m saying is that I’m closer to being a millionaire than Jeff Bezos is.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,305

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

“Likes your story” is a declaration of love.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

If history is repeating itself, when can I buy a pet dinosaur?

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Where do I sign up to be one of those influencers with 2M followers whose whole thing is just standing in front of other people’s content and nodding?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I drive like I’m immortal.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

Don’t know how to explain this, but “hot honey” is the pickleball of condiments (derogatory).

Seen just now on Telegram:

The pizza delivery guys say “see you tomorrow” to everyone, right?

Going viral on Discord:

Just once I’d like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Girls with long hair will literally leave little traces of themselves wherever they go, like feathers falling from an angel’s wings.

Going bananas on WeChat:

The internet is making people stupid. Not me, though.

Shared recently on YouTube:

It’s hard to sleep knowing that cake is in the fridge.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Sometimes, u just gotta clean your room and apply an elaborate skincare routine, and pretend that’s equivalent to getting ur life in order.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Toasters aren’t governed by that little dial. They have free will.

Just shared via Twitch:

If you don’t know how many x-rays it takes before a person develops super powers, should you really be in a medical profession?

Making waves on Discord:

It’s okay to get rid of the boxes for the electronic things you’ve had for the past couple of years.

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