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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, I wasn’t built for casual dating, I’m only built for intense soul crushing love at first sight.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

“Listen to your body!” Okay, well, my body wants to lay down and eat snacks all day.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

They should invent weekends that are long-lasting.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I don’t assume anything except the fetal position.

Just landed via Telegram:

DUI stands for: don’t Uber, I got this.

Just landed via Messenger:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Going viral on X:

The sexual tension between me and disappearing without an explanation.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I don’t wanna party like it’s 1999, I want to pay my bills like it’s 1999.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’m a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Nothing is more fake than my friendliness on the phone at work.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

I wonder if people that fall asleep right away know that we hate them.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Boy, did The Shining nail what it’s like being an only child.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

I already want to come home from work tomorrow.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

You know you’re getting old when you have to watch shows that are in English with subtitles.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

What an awful time to be even remotely aware of what is going on in the world.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

I’ll never understand people who go through self-checkout line and slowly and carefully scan their items. This line is for stealing.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

My kidnappers sent me back early with a full apology, some money, and several of their fingers.

Spotted on Instagram:

Sometimes uncontrollable laughter is all you need to get the millions of thoughts out of your head.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

You can have glossy lips or you can have a cat. You can’t have both.

Freshly posted on Slack:

You ask a girl if she ate, and she gon say, “Yeah, I had my coffee.”

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Meow means woof in cat.

Spotted on Messenger:

You don’t know a person until you’ve seen them eat popcorn.

Seen just now on X:

If I was a microplastic, I would simply not go in the ocean or anyone’s mouth.

Making waves on TikTok:

Sometimes after sex, I wonder what it would be like to have sex as a couple.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Only two things are certain: death, and Princess Diana’s face on at least one grocery store magazine.

Shared recently on YouTube:

As a child, all I wanted was as to be a time traveller, like my grandson and his grandson before him.

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