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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Let’s build a fort with blankets and pillows, and just stay in it all day.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

This whole “having a job” thing is really getting in the way of me having my best life.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Adulthood is just always being tired and wondering how you hurt your back.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Ho, ho, holy shit is Christmas stressful.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Let’s go out for carrots sometime.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Making waves on Telegram:

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

Trending via Snapchat:

A micromanager is someone you pay to watch your top talent walk away.

Breaking via Discord:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Going viral on Telegram:

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

Making waves on Slack:

Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

Just shared via Pinterest:

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

Live now on YouTube:

After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

Making waves on Discord:

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

810 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,972

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,972

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Me: God, please stop giving me your toughest battles. God: You just have to empty the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

I’m at my most math when I solve a problem while creating three new ones.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Rich people go to parties. It’s what they do, and somehow we must all watch videos of it.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Gonorrhea would’ve been a great name for diarrhea medicine.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

Going viral on Slack:

I will never understand why our washing machines feel the need to lie about how much time is left. If you need more time, just let me know, that’s fine.

Going viral on TikTok:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Just landed via Slack:

The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.

Making waves on WeChat:

The one thing I’ve never had in my car’s glove box is a pair of gloves.

Breaking via Telegram:

One week without chocolate. I can no longer hear anything in my left eye.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

Breaking via Messenger:

Everyone is gangster until they’re asked to reveal a “fun fact” about themself as part of a work event icebreaker.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

World domination? I don’t even want to be responsible for myself.

Going viral on Instagram:

Trust my gut? The thing that makes weird gurgling noises immediately when a work meeting goes quiet.

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