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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

If you drink a lot of water, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy looking for a bathroom.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Okay, seen enough, someone put a blanket over my cage.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

If two witches watched two watches, which witch would watch which watch? Each witch would watch which watch belonged to which witch’s wrist.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

“Can you explain the gap in your resume?” I went missing in a national park.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

It’s not getting better or worse, but rather a third mysterious thing.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I don’t need a fancy watch to tell me I’m not fit one bit.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Experts say you can make any statement sound more credible by adding ‘experts say’ at the beginning.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 19, 2026

3,608

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

Boyfriends sound cool and all, but unfortunately, I enjoy not talking for days at a time.

Just shared via TikTok:

If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I don’t know the difference between “gray” & “grey” and I’m too scared to even ask.

Making waves on Pinterest:

If an ice cream truck has its music on, are you supposed to pull over and let it pass like an ambulance?

Just shared via Reddit:

I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

Freshly posted on Slack:

If I had a wife, I’d text her things like, ‘What’s your full name?’ and ‘When’s your birthday?’

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

The ways printers are like kids: Need feeding, are noisy and can’t function when offline.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Girls will be like, “This is my comfort song,” and it’s the howling of a wolf inside a dark forest.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

17 Funny digital detox quotes

Funny digital detox quotes 📵😂 bring laughter to the challenge of unplugging from screens! Whether you’re struggling to resist that buzz or just need a chuckle while going offline, these witty gems remind us that taking a break from technology can be both refreshing and entertaining. Ready to laugh your way to a healthier screen-life balance? Let’s dive into some hilarious digital detox moments! 🤳🚫🌿

New funny digital detox quotes 👇

Sometimes I wanna delete all my social media and throw my phone into a river.

19 hours ago

delete, detox, digital, digital detox, frustration, humor, i, life, media, modern, modern life, phone, relief, river, social, social media, sometimes, stress, stress relief, technology, throw
It’s so unrealistic for me to delete WhatsApp, but man, I’d love to do it.

1 week ago

delete, desire, detox, digital, digital detox, ID, love, man, me, media, messaging, social, social media, unrealistic, WhatsApp
Social media needs to crash for like a year so society can recalibrate.

2 weeks ago

break, crash, detox, digital, digital detox, humor, internet, internet outage, media, needs, outage, recalibrate, satire, social, social media, social media break, society, technology, year
Nothing fixes your life the way deactivating Instagram does.

2 months ago

deactivation, detox, digital, digital detox, fix, humor, Instagram, life, media, nothing, social, social media
Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

2 months ago

back, break, crash, detox, digital, digital detox, life, media, needs, online, online life, perspective, reality, social, social media, social media break, social media detox, virtual, virtual world, world, year
Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

2 months ago

activity, day, detox, digital, digital detox, friends, fun, fun activity, grass, gutted, health, mental, mental health, nature, offline, outdoor, outdoor activity, report, socializing, spending, touching, touching grass
Time to put the stressful screen away (phone) and switch to the comfort screen (Kindle).

2 months ago

away, comfort, detox, digital, digital detox, humor, Kindle, phone, put, reading, relaxation, relief, screen, stress, stress relief, switch, time
She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

2 months ago

detox, digital, digital detox, ever, everyday, everyday life, humor, just, life, novelty, phone, phone usage, right, surprise, technology, time, usage, using, whole
I just want peace, not a notification every time someone breathes.

2 months ago

breath, detox, digital, digital detox, every, health, i, just, media, mental, mental health, mind, notification, notification overload, overload, peace, peace of mind, privacy, social, social media, someone, time, want
I wish there were an option to turn off the Wi-Fi connection for WhatsApp only.

2 months ago

connection, connectivity, detox, digital, digital detox, humor, i, internet, online, only, option, technology, turn, WhatsApp, Wi-Fi, wifi, wish

For even more funny digital detox quotes, hit next 👇

All funny digital detox quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Threads this month:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

60 shares on Telegram this month:

My dad once sneezed so hard that he set every clock back two hours.

51 shares on X this month:

Is it fall yet? I really can’t suck my stomach in much longer.

42 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The moment when I drop my phone, but my fast reflexes slam it into a bloody wall.

69 shares on TikTok this month:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

51 shares on Telegram this month:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

60 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

39 shares on Snapchat this month:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

61 shares on Twitch this month:

My future husband is very lucky; he will never stay hungry, because I know so many restaurants with delicious food.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

When the doorbell rings, I always go to the door with my jacket on. Depending on who it is, I either just want to leave or have just come home.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I really admire the suns ability to be exactly where my car’s visor can’t block it out.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I want a pet eagle that’s trained to steal people’s sandwiches for me.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Just because you can connect to your neighbor’s bluetooth speaker and play ghost noises doesn’t mean you should.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s a good thing that not everyone has a smartphone. We also need people who honk when the lights turn green.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

My diet plan is sometimes, when I’m eating chips, I drop some on the floor, and I don’t eat those ones.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Ummmm, no, I don’t watch ‘Instagram Reels.’ I have TikTok. I like to get my brain damage directly from the original source.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,564

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Sisters are so important. How else would my mom find out all the stuff I didn’t want her to know.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Gollum is like, “Actually, this is my emotional support precious.”

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

My style isn’t even my real style yet. Just wait till my budget matches my vision.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

What’s wrong, babe? You hardly touched your own advice you give to others.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I tried selling my soul to the devil, and he said no.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Every time we try to eat healthy, along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday, and ruins it for us.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

I should have been a Librarian, my favorite thing to do is telling people to shut up.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Making waves on Messenger:

Right before rock bottom, you’ll have a city builder game on your phone.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked, whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

Just landed via Pinterest:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Shared recently on Telegram:

It’s the perfect time of year to focus on my indoor hobbies, like lying down in a dark room and feeling insane.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

Just shared via Discord:

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Born to hate people. Somehow ended up in customer service.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

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