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Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Relationship tip: Make sure you’re the crazy one.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

The more you embrace your crazy side, the more fun life becomes.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

That awkward moment when you have to pretend that you like the gift.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

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I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,725

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

Toys R Us went out of business because their mascot was a stupid giraffe when it could’ve been a toy dinosaur called the Toysaurus. It was right there man.

Shared recently on X:

I belong to the generation that repaired the TV with a single blow to the casing.

Spotted on Slack:

My bank account and I are no longer on speaking terms.

Trending via WeChat:

Maybe God will gift me a boyfriend for my birthday this year.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

Seen just now on X:

Being bi means you say both yay and bruh.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

People pleasers aren’t kind. They’re afraid.

Sometimes I wanna delete all my social media and throw my phone into a river.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Probably not a great idea unless you've mastered the art of skipping phones instead of stones 😂📱💦

delete, detox, digital, digital detox, frustration, humor, i, life, media, modern, modern life, phone, relief, river, social, social media, sometimes, stress, stress relief, technology, throw

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Next time I feel butterflies, I’m chugging down a bottle of tequila so they drown.

1 month ago
anxiety, bottle, butterfly, chugging, coping, coping mechanism, drinking, feel, humor, i, mechanism, nervousness, next, tequila, time
If I’m out drinking and “Push It” starts playing, take me home immediately.

1 month ago
dance, drinking, home, humor, me, music, nightlife, party, playing, push, song, take
When you’re sad, find two equally sad friends and form a cryangle.

1 month ago
amusing, comedy, emotional, emotional support, form, friends, friendship, humor, humorist, lighthearted, sad, sadness, social, support
I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

1 month ago
humor, i, irony, moon, phone, photograph, respect, unwillingness
Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

1 month ago
bad, bad decision, decision, excuse, humor, me, procrastination, self-deprecation, today
My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

1 month ago
advice, kid, kids, kindergarten, money, saving, start

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

The best way to reach me is with intelligence and humor.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Once I see a vein on your forehead while we arguing, I’ll let you be.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Technology has gone too far, man. My roommate is logged out of his lightbulbs because he forgot his password.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

God: “You’re all a bunch of bastards and I should never have created you.”

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

My tattoo means that I can’t be trusted with $200.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Trending via Slack:

We can’t use nicknames at work anymore, and I blame Teletubby.

Making waves on Facebook:

Watching Unsolved Mysteries and getting mad when they don’t solve the mystery at the end.

Breaking via Reddit:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Going viral on Reddit:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

Making waves on Facebook:

I was a nothingburger to him, but he was an everything bagel to me…

Making waves on Reddit:

Who can better express pain and grief and misery than a man with a harmonica?

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Activity Log ✨

Sometimes I wanna delete all my social media and throw my phone into a river.

Next time I feel butterflies, I’m chugging down a bottle of tequila so they drown.

If I’m out drinking and “Push It” starts playing, take me home immediately.

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

Every time I do something stupid, my dad stares at my mom like he wants a refund.

Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. It will never bring you true happiness or fulfillment. Also, it’s a felony.

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Sleep is a beautiful thing. You don’t miss anyone, you can’t do anything wrong and you simply feel nothing.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I love 12 a.m. to 5 a.m. The world is so quiet.

I get it, orcas. Sometimes you just need to ruin a yacht to feel something.

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

At the grocery store, progressively booing louder as the clerk scans each item.

The lioness does not concern herself with the pile of clothes she moves between bed and chair every day.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Don’t bother telling me where you’re from, I have no geographical knowledge and no sense of direction.

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Texting is so boring. Just show up to my door with roses.

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Apparently, everyone on the Zoom calls outside my office finds my singing distracting.

No plans and no pants kind of day.

Divorcing my wife to focus on my porn addiction.

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

I wonder how much time The Weeknd saves not typing that extra e.

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Sometimes I wanna delete all my social media and throw my phone into a river.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Next time I feel butterflies, I’m chugging down a bottle of tequila so they drown.

If I’m out drinking and “Push It” starts playing, take me home immediately.

When you’re sad, find two equally sad friends and form a cryangle.

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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