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Someone from has bookmarked:

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

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I’m basically the human version of tangled up Christmas lights.

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I tried to act normal once, worst five minutes of my life.

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“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

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Through repetition and sheer will I’ve mastered gracefully falling on my head.

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Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

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If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

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If you like true crime stories, I highly recommend the history of the Catholic Church.

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I never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

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I bet whenever a pilot drives a car there’s a brief moment of panic like “why isn’t it going up?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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2317 added this month

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Spotted on LinkedIn:

Not much is worse than that feeling of going back to work after a lunch, or a vacation, or just going to work in general.

Spotted on Telegram:

I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I miss when bills were none of my business.

Going viral on Slack:

Dear Santa, Money!

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’m the Usain Bolt of running late.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

Making waves on Telegram:

Do y’all ever get pre-annoyed? Like, you already know someone is about to piss you off.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“This too shall pass.” And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never f**king ends.

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My dad thought Siri would be more helpful finding a lemon ricotta recipe if he used an Italian accent.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Best friends: they know how crazy you are but still choose to be seen in public with you.

Home » Funny Do Nothing Quotes

Funny do nothing quotes

Funny do nothing quotes are the perfect excuse to embrace your inner couch potato 🛋️😄! Sometimes, doing absolutely nothing is an art form, and these witty lines celebrate the joy of chillin’ without a care 💤✨. Ready to laugh, relax, and maybe procrastinate a little? Let these playful quotes remind you that sometimes the best plan is no plan at all! 😂🎉

New funny do nothing quotes 👇

2 weeks ago
Share →: Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

Commentary:
When "anything" includes doing dishes, men suddenly develop spontaneous selective hearing 😂🙉🍽️
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: Some days you just feel like a hotel microwave. You’re here, but you don’t have enough power to actually do anything.

Commentary:
"Feeling like a hotel microwave: all that potential, but in reality, just a warm and forgettable presence 🍿💥 Just waiting for someone to hit the 'start' button on life! 🔌 #MicrowaveMood"
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: I’m already far too stressed as it is. And then you also have to have time to just sit there and do nothing.

Commentary:
"Trying to balance stress levels and doing nothing is an art form 🎨💆‍♂️ It's like juggling chaos and serenity at the same time! 🤹‍♂️ #LifeGoals"
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: Some days you feel like a hotel light. You’re there, but you don’t have enough energy to really do anything.

Commentary:
Feeling like a hotel light on low power mode 💡🔋 Just hanging in there without much spark! Let's hope tomorrow brings a full charge and some bright ideas! 🌟💡 #LowEnergyDays
Jan 20, 2025
Share →: I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

Commentary:
"Ah, the noble pursuit of doing nothing, truly an art form in itself! 🎨⏳ Why go out and be busy when you can rush home to embrace the serenity of your sofa and the sweet siren call of laziness? 😄💤 Embrace the art of 'nothingness' with gusto, my friend! 🏠🛋️"