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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

To the person who stole my place in the queue. I’m after you now.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

How about hold me as tight as you’re holding onto that grudge?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as for 31 days? Where is my change?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

My plans for today? Same as always, drink coffee and be sexy.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

If I say goodnight and an hour later you see me online, it’s not that I lied; it’s just that I failed.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

People in glass houses shouldn’t throw orgies.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

May life treat you exactly the same way you treat servers, store clerks, senior citizens, children, and animals.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

It’s funny how quickly you become difficult if you don’t always just say “yes”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,656

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

Just landed via Telegram:

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

Making waves on TikTok:

Most insane people live outside of madhouses.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I don’t get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am.

Shared recently on TikTok:

There’s a disgusting pervert at the bar watching pornography over my shoulder.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Humans should grow a new set of teeth in our 30s to make-up for all the poor decisions in our 20s.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

The younger generation will never know the fear and anxiety of calling your friend’s house, and their parents answer the phone.

Going viral on WeChat:

“I’ll see” = not coming, never was coming, never even considered it.

Seen just now on Reddit:

The term “domestic housewife” implies the existence of a feral housewife and that is what I aspire to be.

Home » funny memory

Funny funny memory quotes

New funny funny memory quotes 👇

Your childhood wasn’t complete unless you were chased by a dog… or a goat… or even worse, a chicken.

0

3 weeks ago

animal, animal chase, chase, chased, chicken, childhood, complete, dog, even, funny memory, goat, memory, worse
I will never forget when my dad had a guy from Verizon call me in middle school to tell me that I was using more data than Obama and that I need to stop.

0

2 months ago

call, dad, data, forget, funny memory, guy, i, me, memory, middle, middle school, need, never, Obama, phone, school, stop, tell, using, Verizon

All funny funny memory quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on X this month:

Which is it, brain? Does nothing matter or do I need to be anxious about everything?

19 shares on X this month:

Sometimes, in the middle of eating a rotisserie chicken, I ask myself “did I just run a red light?”

53 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish you could put your whole life on do not disturb.

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

People used to fly kites. Glad that’s over with.

96 shares on Reddit this month:

Sorry for running at you on all fours, I was excited to see you.

96 shares on Slack this month:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

56 shares on Discord this month:

My cat runs a secret cult. I just pay the rent.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

52 shares on Messenger this month:

I love to watch the enthusiasm of new coworkers, and then their inevitable slow descent into not giving a damn.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Who are these people that buy unsalted butter on purpose?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Apparently “ew no” is not an acceptable way to tell my boss I don’t want more responsibility at work.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

During winter, it’s either lazy starvation or eight thousand calories in one sitting.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

How can people lift weights? My arms get tired just by putting my hair up in a ponytail.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

To all of you who have never tried blindfold archery: You don’t know what you’re missing!

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

If people continue to behave so badly, I will donate my organs to an animal shelter.

Shared recently on Facebook:

My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making, and now, I can’t read anything.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

They say “When you snooze, you lose”… I say “When you take a nappy, you are happy.”

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn’t know how awesome I was going to be today either.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Me: This show is really boring. Boss: Again, this a zoom conference.

Spotted on Messenger:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Just landed via Slack:

If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth.

Going bananas on X:

Gnocchi: The small, chubby children of spaghetti and potatoes.

Spotted on Telegram:

I was feeling kinda lonely this morning so I glued a coffee cup to the top of my car so people would wave at me.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Funny funny memory quotes

New funny funny memory quotes 👇

Your childhood wasn’t complete unless you were chased by a dog… or a goat… or even worse, a chicken.

I will never forget when my dad had a guy from Verizon call me in middle school to tell me that I was using more data than Obama and that I need to stop.

All funny funny memory quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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