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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

Today marks a five year anniversary of how I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

If someone else makes you a sandwich, it’s always better than if you do it yourself. It’s the same with sex.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Shoutout to coughing on the bus. Haven’t tried it myself but seems really popular.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

With no training whatsoever, I took out myself and the other two people exiting the ski lift in one fell swoop.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

I actually love talking to strangers, they will unknowingly say some shit that shifts your perspective, and you never see them again.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I don’t get involved in anyone’s business, let alone their drama. You should try it.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I don’t mind being the villain in your story because you’re a clown in mine.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

I have no desire to work now. I had five days off in a row where I dined at a feast and was entertained at a cinema. I have flown too high to return to a laptop.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

I have an emotional support chicken roasting in the oven.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,363

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

Telling my boss I can’t come back to work because I’ve discovered the joy of doing nothing.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

When the executioner asks me what my final words are, I’m just going to start filibustering.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I downloaded a meditation app. Now I’m stressed about missing sessions.

Trending via TikTok:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Trending via Telegram:

Part of fatherhood is becoming an expert in some obscure topic and teaching it to your children who stopped listening 30 minutes ago.

Just shared via Slack:

The only time anyone should watch the news is to study how psychological manipulation works on the general public.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Sometimes, after I’ve completed a task that wasn’t on my to-do list, I’ll add it and then cross it off for the free dopamine boost.

Just landed via Reddit:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Shared recently on Threads:

I did not “try to rob a bank,” I just “aspired” to obtain more money.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

One person’s logic is another one’s “what the heck?”

Funny Hotmail quotes

Funny Hotmail quotes are the perfect way to bring some nostalgia and laughs to your day! 😂📧 Whether you grew up waiting for that classic email ding or just love a good tech throwback, these witty gems will brighten your inbox and tickle your funny bone. From email fails to quirky Hotmail moments, get ready for a hilarious ride down memory lane! 💻✨ #ThrowbackVibes #EmailLOL

New funny Hotmail quotes 👇

All funny Hotmail quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Pinterest this month:

This generation of men makes celibacy so easy for women.

89 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ve been alive my whole life, and not once have I seen a commercial for Chinese food.

75 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t believe in lying to children, unless it’s about where the good snacks are hidden. Then it’s fine.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

A big part of aging is accumulating keys and not knowing what they’re for.

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

61 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s crazy how genuinely entertaining it is to stare into an open fire. That’s some real epigenetic memory shit.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

Sleeping is nice, because you’re not actually dead and you’re not awake, so its a win-win situation.

18 shares on X this month:

When I tell my kids I’ll do something in a minute, what I’m really saying is “Please forget.”

26 shares on Discord this month:

If I had The Force, I’d just use it to open pistachios.

27 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you’re a mad scientist, put a note in your laboratory reminding you to sometimes be a happy scientist.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Gonna take the kids to the planetarium so they can watch YouTube on their phones.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time I use a Windows computer, it’s like they built malware into the OS. Like, what do you mean there are ads in the start menu?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not a competition, but if it was I would win.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know when people started calling hot dogs ‘glizzys,’ but I hate it, and you all need to stop immediately.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Apple want $3,500 for their Vision Pro. No thanks. I can look like a dork for free.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking a film guy, “Who is that?” when Tom Cruise comes on screen just to feel something.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,315

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Everyone’s gangster until they use a pen that is satisfyingly smooth and fun to write with.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

I need a six-month vacation twice a year.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

If I honk at this person, maybe it will make them a better person.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

We need a Disney princess who’s a greedy profiteer, so we can cheer for the poison apple.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Which is it, brain? Does nothing matter or do I need to be anxious about everything?

Live now on Telegram:

Took a personality test and the results just said “uh-oh”

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Making waves on Threads:

Everyone is fighting a battle you don’t know about, except for me. I am complaining loudly about my battle. Everybody knows about it.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Anything is free if you can outrun security. The more you know.

Making waves on WeChat:

Men have nice skin because they stress out everyone but themselves.

Just landed via X:

Men invented pool tables so they could watch each other bend over.

Breaking via Slack:

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

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