Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

We got the Christmas tree yesterday, and now my wife knows that I was the chief architect working on the leaning tower of Pisa.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

As a parent of a teenage daughter, I would like to formally apologize to my parents for my tube-top and low-rise jeans era.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Every time I do something stupid, my dad stares at my mom like he wants a refund.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

Looking to sell my DeLorean. Great shape, low mileage. Only driven from time to time.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I do not use AI, I use Reddit commenters’ opinions as fact because they are right.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

It’s a shame that you can’t hold people up to the light like banknotes to see whether they are fake or real.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

“Fox Mulder” is an aggressively sexy name.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,410

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again.

Seen just now on Slack:

Gen Z will be like “OMG new life hack!” and then it’s a video of them adjusting the toaster dial.

Spotted on WeChat:

I should’ve been an air conditioner because all I do is vent.

Shared recently on Facebook:

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Spotted on TikTok:

My phone and it’s charger are in a situationship and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.

Just shared via Messenger:

Babies are undefeated at debate. Their gibberish is too passionate.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

The only career advice I have is make every decision that moves you closer to not having to be on LinkedIn.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Goodnight Outlook, goodnight Teams, goodnight Zoom.

Going viral on Threads:

It’s freezing cold outside and my polar bear won’t start.

Funny limited quotes

Funny limited quotes bring a burst of laughter and wit in just a few words 😄✨ Perfect for brightening your day or sharing a quick giggle with friends 😂🔥 Whether you need a clever one-liner or a cheeky punch, these gems pack a punch without overstaying their welcome 🎯💬 Get ready to smile and share the fun! 🎉🤩

New funny limited quotes 👇

All funny limited quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Discord this month:

Here I am, block me like a hurricane.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

69 shares on Facebook this month:

Can I come over and circle you like a vulture?

79 shares on Discord this month:

Still writing the old year on all my ransom notes.

22 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m so glad I cleaned the house so the kids have a clean canvas to drop their stuff everywhere.

62 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.

87 shares on Pinterest this month:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

44 shares on Slack this month:

Sometimes I wonder if the plot ever gets tired of being twisted.

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

49 shares on Twitch this month:

When my cat gets in trouble I call him by his full name, Catthew.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Just found out my 84-year-old neighbour is on his own tomorrow, so I’ve just been over to collect his spare chairs to borrow.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

If you need ChatGPT to write an email, maybe you shouldn’t have job.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Women will invite you to shower with them, then cook you alive with a temperature of water you didn’t know existed.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The wind is about to blow me to Oz, so if you see me flying past your window, mind your business.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

A house doesn’t have to be haunted to scare me, I’ve seen the listing prices.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The secret to being a private person is to overshare dumb shit so people think you are an open book but then not tell them any of the important details of your life.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,316

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

How quickly family vacations go from “Omg, we only have 4 days left” to “Omg, we still have 4 days left”

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Resting bitch face saves me from so many conversations I don’t want to be part of.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I think I’m about six months away from the perfect ‘before’ picture.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Due to unforeskin circumcistances …

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Dogs have two jobs: calm their humans when they are stressed. Stress their humans when they are calm.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

My OnlyFans is just hours of me untangling Christmas lights.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

Nobody has ever been more surprised than a husband hearing about his wife’s plans for the second time.

Just landed via TikTok:

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Just say, “My future husband would never do that,” and move on.

Just landed via Twitch:

How many of you also constantly take screenshots of something and then never look at them again?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

Just landed via Telegram:

Who can better express pain and grief and misery than a man with a harmonica?

Making waves on Discord:

Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

Going bananas on WeChat:

I’ll be honest. I can’t solve your problems. What I can do is create new, bigger problems that will make your current problems seem quaint by comparison.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I hate when recipes tell you to take something out of the pan and add it back in later. No way bro. It’s staying in there.

Trending via Pinterest:

Can’t believe I didn’t get invited to that party I would have made up an excuse not to go to.

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