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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Any room can be a panic room if you just give me a second.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Twitter is the only place you argue with CEOs and heads of states while sleeping in the kitchen.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

First date idea: you transfer me all your crypto.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I don’t understand people who say “I don’t know how to thank you.” Like they never heard of money.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

They won’t teach you this in school, but life is all about going to weird little diners.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

They hooked up tubes and sensors, but the doctor still can’t figure out why my kisses are so sweet. They want to hold me overnight and “never let go.”

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Hug your children as often as you can. They can’t break things during this time.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Okay, this integrity isn’t going to compromise itself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,337

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

“Nah.” – everyone with an office job, from the Monday after Thanksgiving until January 2nd.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I have more trips planned than I have money.

Going bananas on TikTok:

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

Making waves on Discord:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Anyone want to meet up and just scream… We could get food after.

Just landed via Telegram:

Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Inside you, there are two wolves. Kevin Costner is dancing with both of them. I don’t know how this works.

Breaking via Messenger:

Twitter is basically like a mental institution where everyone thinks they’re the sane one, and everybody else is crazy.

Going viral on Discord:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”

Funny schizophrenia quotes

Funny schizophrenia quotes bring a lighthearted twist to a complex topic, blending humor with understanding 🤪🧠. They shine a playful spotlight on mental health, breaking stigma one chuckle at a time 😂✨. Whether you’re looking to brighten your day or spark a thoughtful smile, these quotes offer a unique mix of wit and empathy 🌈💬. Ready to laugh and learn? Let’s dive into the quirky side of schizophrenia humor! 🎉💡

New funny schizophrenia quotes 👇

All funny schizophrenia quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Sorry, I would love to, but I just made a bunch of rules for myself, and I’m actually not allowed to do that.

50 shares on Facebook this month:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

58 shares on Slack this month:

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

14 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

82 shares on Threads this month:

I grew up in a kinder, gentler age. We pitied our fools.

28 shares on Instagram this month:

Men tell you “I know a place” and bring you to the brink of madness.

85 shares on TikTok this month:

Awkward is the new sexy. At least that’s what I’m telling myself, so I don’t cry in front of strangers.

19 shares on Twitch this month:

Only two things are certain: death, and Princess Diana’s face on at least one grocery store magazine.

59 shares on YouTube this month:

I never had a year with this much thinking. I’ve been thinking since the 1st.

36 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking my landlord if he has any Cyber Monday deals.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I don’t worry about things at all and other times I am awake.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Just had a crazy revelation: you can eat in the airport after your flight, too.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

People make the mistake of keeping aubergines in the fridge, when in fact they should be kept in the bin.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I like to describe the difference between theory and practice with shopping lists and receipts.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Desperately seeking my soul, mate.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

A political guy who supports communism because he hates applying for jobs and just wants to be assigned somewhere.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from reading your book.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,581

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Caught my husband staring at me again. He’s probably weighing his pros and cons.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Would pay $10 a month for Summer Premium Package without wasps.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

May I please come over and curl up in your lap like a cat?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

The problem with dating apps is I don’t wanna date someone that would use a dating app.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Can’t stand when I’m determined to see something in a negative light, and somebody offers a different, healthier perspective. I already made up my mind to be upset. Don’t be rude.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Every time I have to leave the house and be around people I remember why I hate having to leave the house and be around people.

Spotted on Facebook:

I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”

Spotted on Threads:

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I can’t believe that it’s our turn to give money to our nephews and nieces.

Just landed via Twitch:

I need a chiropractor for my brain.

Just landed via TikTok:

The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

Going bananas on X:

I like my messages, how I like my nuts – MIXED.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I am thick and tired.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

Making waves on Facebook:

First date idea: I lean in close and surprise you with a wet willy.

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