17 Funny shark quotes

• Showing your emotions to the wrong people is like bleeding next to a shark.

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  2 weeks ago

  bleeding, danger, emotion, emotions, feelings, metaphor, next, people, shark, showing, trust, vulnerability, wrong

• A shark could swim faster than me, but I could probably run faster than a shark. So, in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.

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  1 month ago

  better, competition, cycling, cyclist, faster, humor, i, me, run, shark, speed, swim, triathlon

• Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

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  2 months ago

  animal, animal comparison, comparison, creature, dolphin, elf, fantasy, humor, mythical, mythical creature, orc, shark

• A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

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  2 months ago

  comparison, entertainment, humor, love, relationship, shark, TV

• If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

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  2 months ago

  asked, bigger, boat, humor, i, Jaws, just, movie, shark, smaller, wish, wishing

• The most avoided species of shark is the Loan.

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  2 months ago

  avoidance, finance, humor, joke, loan, shark, specy

• Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people.

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  2 months ago

  actually, antique, attack, doll, fear, human, humans, humor, irony, majority, murder, people, porcelain, porcelain doll, rare, rarity, shark, shark attack

• There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

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  2 months ago

  arrested, comedy, crimes, humor, jail, Jaws, movie, sequel, shark, should, where

• I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

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  2 months ago

  blood, call, cravings, eat, emotions, everything, everywhere, feel, huge, humor, i, me, menstruation, people, period, scared, shark, Shark week, snapping, want, week

• Your odds are greater of being killed by a coconut rather than a shark and this is exactly why I don’t swim in coconut-infested waters.

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  2 months ago

  being, coconut, danger, exactly, humor, i, infested, killed, odds, shark, swim, water

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