Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Going from “I can fix her” to “I don’t care if she lives or dies” in the same beer.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

I want to sit and read, take a nap, and snack. Basically, I want to be in kindergarten.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Playing Mortal Kombat at an arcade in the 90’s would fix me.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

If the math problems are too difficult for me, I post them online and write: “Only 1 in 10 can solve this problem.”

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

Babies sighing is so funny to me. My dear, the time to sigh has not come.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,354

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

Just shared via X:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

No ChatGPT for me, thanks. I will be asking Liam Gallagher on Twitter.

Trending via Pinterest:

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I love sleeping so much that it is the first thing I think about when I wake up.

Shared recently on Reddit:

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

Just landed via Reddit:

I think airplanes would be way cooler if the wings flapped like a bird.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’d imagine the sound of clowns having sex would just be a cacophony of bicycle horns.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

After all these years, Jude Law has finally noticed me and responded to my love letters. Something about staying 500 feet away. I’m getting it framed.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

Funny smiling quotes

Funny smiling quotes 😄 are the perfect pick-me-up when you need a little sunshine ☀️ in your day! They turn ordinary grins into contagious laughter 😂 and remind us that smiling is the best kind of therapy 😜. Ready to brighten your mood and share some giggles? Keep reading for a dose of happiness that’ll have you smiling from ear to ear! 😁✨

New funny smiling quotes 👇

All funny smiling quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Telegram this month:

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

22 shares on Telegram this month:

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

48 shares on X this month:

I just be giggling, then start thinking about bills and remember ain’t nothing funny.

21 shares on WeChat this month:

Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.

80 shares on Slack this month:

You look like you can go as yourself for Halloween.

70 shares on Slack this month:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

81 shares on Reddit this month:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

82 shares on Snapchat this month:

The list of women who haven’t slept with me is really impressive.

71 shares on Telegram this month:

Can’t. Calling out some bullshitters on some bullshit.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

We could all be hibernating right now but noooooo we have to be “adults” with “responsibilities”.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Someone called me strict today, and that means a lot to me because I’m a recovering people pleaser.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

5 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ever see me out in public, just know I don’t want to be there.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My dad’s handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My unemployed neighbor with an unlimited firework budget would like to wish everyone a happy 9th of July.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,656

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Experts say you can make any statement sound more credible by adding ‘experts say’ at the beginning.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Country music is for men who need a little help crying.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

My desire to be informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane.

Going viral on YouTube:

If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

Live now on X:

The worst part of my grandfather’s dementia was slowly watching him forget about Dre.

Seen just now on Messenger:

“Why would I lie to you?” I don’t know, maybe because you’re a liar.

Spotted on Twitch:

Bursting into a million bats the second I see you.

Just landed via Messenger:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Just shared via Reddit:

Does running actually get easier if you do it a lot, or is it that you just get more masochistic?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

My favourite yoga pose is the one where you lay really still and do nothing.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I don’t need a recipe for disaster. I usually just eyeball it.

Seen just now on Facebook:

The closest I have ever come to bungee jumping was when I was born.

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