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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Men need women, women need men. The end.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Nice tots you got there. Be a shame if someone tatered em.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Nothing is worse than seeing a gorgeous girl that I’d never approach or stand a chance with and then finding out she has a boyfriend.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Texting a man first feels like I’m on my hands and knees begging him to talk to me.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

You told your cat how much you love him, but now it’s morning, the sun is out, you’re sober, and it’s just weird for both of you.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

Welcome to adulthood. The weekend is your only time to catch up on everything, but also your only time to do absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Ping me if your boobs glow in the dark.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,494

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Unless I ask, I genuinely don’t care to hear other people’s opinions on my life. It’s almost a pet peeve, really.

Spotted on Threads:

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

Just shared via YouTube:

Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

Breaking via Messenger:

Cause of death: Trying to draw eyebrows on the neighbor’s cat.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Are you okay, babe? You’ve barely moved in mysterious ways recently.

Going viral on TikTok:

I hate it when I do the math about where my money went, and it all adds up. No one robbed me; I didn’t lose it. It was really all me.

Just shared via Messenger:

By the time someone says, ‘To make a long story short,’ it’s too late.

Live now on Messenger:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Entered this world crying, and honestly, not much has changed.

Funny tiptoe quotes

Funny tiptoe quotes tiptoe into your day with a splash of laughter and a dash of sneakiness 🐾😂 Whether you’re trying to avoid waking the kids or just creeping around like a stealthy ninja 🥷, these witty sayings will have you giggling quietly and walking on the lighter side of life 🌟👣. Ready to tiptoe through humor? Let’s sneak a peek!

New funny tiptoe quotes 👇

All funny tiptoe quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Discord this month:

I have this ability where I can look at someone’s profile picture and determine whether they are evil or not.

74 shares on Messenger this month:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

39 shares on WeChat this month:

You look like the kind of person who would hit rock bottom and then start drilling.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

25 shares on Threads this month:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

71 shares on Threads this month:

I’m going to sleep. Anyone want anything?

76 shares on X this month:

Italy stands for I Truly Always Love You.

67 shares on YouTube this month:

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

59 shares on Discord this month:

If you’re having a good day today, don’t play Wordle.

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I know I’m mad when I start talking to myself about it.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I hurt my bottom after shaking it at the office party. It was a twerk-place injury.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Always remember, if you ever need me, I’m just several phone calls and unread texts away.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The sexual tension between me and not finishing the last 2 episodes of a drama.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing like a meteor shower to remind you that burning out can still be breathtaking.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Instead of calling it the John I’m going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ever wanted to know anything about me, just get me a bottle of wine, and you will, in fact, find out in about 10 minutes.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

His palm trees are Serengeti, destination wedding, luggage is heavy. There’s vomit on his tux already, Dollar store confetti.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t wait to go to bed, get terrible sleep, and wake up exhausted with a sore back.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,674

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

You’d think someone in the room would’ve spoken up like “hey guys, maybe it’s a bad idea to make one ring to rule them all”.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Does anyone else run a used match under water before disposing of it because you’re afraid it still has some fire left in it, or are you normal?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

I would love to have children one day. Two days maximum.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

I have some cake and now I’m eating it too. Not seeing the problem here.

Making waves on YouTube:

If you’re ever intimidated by someone just imagine them opening a Capri Sun.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Live now on Messenger:

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

Broadcasted on X:

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

Shared recently on Instagram:

“I’m at a point in my life where I don’t go anywhere unless I absolutely have to.”

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Hiking in your 40s is a great way to meet new people. Today I met two paramedics, three nurses, a cardiologist, and nearly met Jesus.

Spotted on Twitch:

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

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