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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Eating rice with my hands, but not in a political way. In a lazy, fat guy way.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Welcome to your 50s: You’re not attracted to anyone who likes you.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

I took your advice and worked smarter not harder. Now I’m going to need your advice on a good lawyer.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,551

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Diabetes was the God of sugar.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

My super talent is hitting every red light on the way to wherever the hell I’m going.

Going viral on Slack:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Seen just now on X:

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

Spotted on TikTok:

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

We literally used to write an essay by hand.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Old age comes at a bad time. Once you finally know everything, you start to forget everything you know.

Funny unprecedented quotes

Funny unprecedented quotes are the ultimate mood boosters 😂✨—those unexpected gems that catch you off guard and crack you up in the best way! Whether they’re quirky one-liners or bizarrely clever observations, these quotes add a splash of humor to your day 🌈🤣. Ready to laugh like never before? Let’s dive into a world where wit meets surprise and hilarity reigns supreme! 🎉😜

New funny unprecedented quotes 👇

All funny unprecedented quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on TikTok this month:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

73 shares on Twitch this month:

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

87 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’ve been closer to death than a stable relationship.

60 shares on Slack this month:

Making things weird is probably the only thing I’m good at.

47 shares on X this month:

Is everything expensive or am I just poor?

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Maybe I prefer my ducks scattered about.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

Practicing how I’m gonna explain to the aliens that baseline and Vaseline do not sound the same.

56 shares on YouTube this month:

Absolutely destroyed my bed last night… I cuddled those covers so hard.

64 shares on TikTok this month:

Writers should get a direct line to the FBI so we can call them and give them a heads up when we’re googling ways to poison someone but just for a story.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Everybody’s back hurts until it’s time to have sexy time.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t get how alcohol turns y’all evil. I just start giggling and get slutty.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Saturdays are for doing absolutely everything or doing absolutely nothing, everybody knows that.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Deleting dating apps because I want to meet someone the old fashioned way (he and his donkey rescue me from a tower guarded by a dragon).

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Everybody thinks “Free Hugs” signs are cute, unless you’re a boa constrictor.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Have you fallen in love with me yet, or do I need to post more nonsense?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Venn diagrams. You either love ‘em or you hate ‘em. Or you’re somewhere in the middle.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’ve never done parkour, but I have chased a toddler with an open Sharpie through the house.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,629

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

My brain is 80% song lyrics.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Of all the things to lose why couldn’t it have been my appetite and not my mind.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

It’s like my wish isn’t even your command anymore…

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

If you want your teen to finish her homework, tell her to fold the laundry.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

Doggy style is out cat style is in. It’s where I let you touch me until I’m satisfied then ignore you and scratch you if you try and touch me again.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’m an adult, but not the ‘makes positive life choices’ kind.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Teens are like, “My homework isn’t done, but check out this presentation I made on why I need Instagram.”

Live now on Facebook:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

Breaking via Discord:

You lose some, you lose some more.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

Trending via TikTok:

Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.

Just shared via WeChat:

If I was God, I would’ve equipped women with venom glands.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Going viral on WeChat:

They did so well traumatizing us about teen pregnancy, I’m still traumatized as an adult.

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