Funny unusual quotes

• Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

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  2 months ago

  abandoned, abandoned quarry, boss, evaluation, funny situation, humor, me, meet, meeting, midnight, odd, odd request, performance, performance evaluation, quarry, request, situation, told, unusual, unusual meeting, work, work humor

• Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

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  2 months ago

  absolutely, awkward, awkward moment, field, guy, humor, moment, pervert, reason, single, single guy, situation, sunflower, sunflower field, unusual, unusual situation

• I’ve been locked out of Tinder because of “unusual activity”. I must’ve got a match.

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  2 months ago

  activity, dating, humor, i, locked, lockout, match, Tinder, unusual, unusual activity

• I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while.

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  2 months ago

  broccoli, comparison, feel, feeling, grocery, grocery store, humor, i, little, misty, nature, rain, store, unusual, unusual comparison

• Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

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  2 months ago

  airport, anything, asked, coke, expensive, food, food pricing, humor, i, joke, just, me, paid, pricing, sandwich, security, seen, start, travel, unusual

• I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

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  2 months ago

  abacus, funny skill, humor, i, know, music, skill, talent, tambourine, unusual, unusual talent

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