50+ Funny Satire Quotes That Prove Mocking Reality Is The Best Comedy

New funny satire quotes

• Wonder what I should wear to World War III.

• Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

• Which wine pairs best with WWIII?

• I would like to opt out of WW3, por favor.

• Chasing after a ping pong ball is wildly dehumanizing.

• If cartoons have taught us anything, it’s the uselessness of little umbrellas when plummeting from a cliff.

• I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

• Think I’ll get high enough to find out if there’s a God. Stay tuned.

• “I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” Yeah, well, I just analyzed it from a Marxist perspective, and it was pretty obvious.

• I’m not even doomscrolling anymore; I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Top funny satire quotes

• Quitting my job to focus more on my desire not to work anymore.

• If McDonald’s sold hot dogs, would you be able to, with a straight face, order a McWiener and tell them to supersize it?

• Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

• Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

• Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

• Of course, being a child is terrible. They don’t give you any money, and then make you watch commercials the whole time.

• I can’t watch Sex and the City anymore, because I get really upset at how much money these ladies have.

• Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

• I predict the next world war will be artificial intelligence versus genuine stupidity.

• Church should be less preachy and more eat-y.

Popular funny satire quotes

• Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

• Given the amount of clowns around here, you’d think it would be more entertaining.

• Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

• No matter how small you make that “unsubscribe” link, I’ll still find it.

• Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

• More often than not, I read applause as applesauce.

• Women’s skincare is so confusing. Am I supposed to look shiny and sweaty, or matte like cement?

• I’m planning to eat the rich, but can I sub out fries for a salad?

• We need a Disney princess who’s a greedy profiteer, so we can cheer for the poison apple.

• Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

More funny satire quotes

• I’m a social media influencer in that I’ve influenced people to ignore me on social media.

• We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

• Ok, hear me out: a reality show where billionaire CEOs have to live off of their lowest-paid employees’ salaries for a month.

• America’s national anthem should be changed to Welcome to the Jungle.

• I just saw someone on TikTok say that the reason the world didn’t end in 2012 is because Psy turned the Honmoon gold with Gangnam Style.

• You should just baseline mistrust every single politician at every level until they prove themselves worthy of liking.

• I cheat on my taxes by sleeping with other people’s taxes.

• Why can’t hackers just delete everyone’s bad debt, credit, and mortgages?

• You’ve got to question the legitimacy of the Burger Kingdom if Burger King is just handing out crowns to anybody willy-nilly.

• I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Witty satire quotes

• Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

• I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

• I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

• Socialism is like polio, it comes back when people forget about the horrible damage it did last time.

• I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

• If you only watched reality TV dating shows, you would probably estimate the number of people who work in medical device sales in the United States to be approximately 80,000,000.

• I’m sick of living through history!

• “Real Housewives” is a great oxymoron because nothing about them is real.

• The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

• The concept of a drive-by doesn’t really exist in the swamp biome; instead, people rap about doing bog-emerges.

Funny satire quotes remind us that sometimes the best way to deal with life’s craziness is to mock it mercilessly 🤣. Whether it’s exposing society’s weird obsessions, pointing out obvious contradictions 🙃, or roasting human behavior 🔥, satire makes us laugh while secretly admitting it’s all true. These quotes are perfect for anyone who appreciates humor with a sharp edge ✨. So keep the sarcasm sharp, the wit ready, and enjoy the hilarious brilliance of satire 🤪!