New funny start quotes

• I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

• I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

• Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

• Girl, I’m bored. Let’s start drinking the daily recommended 10-15 cups of water.

• The feminine urge to start a coven.

• That period between finding out you got a new job and actually starting the new job is one of the best times in life.

• I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

• Jobs be asking me for 3 references, and I think I might start doing the same. Like, let me talk to 3 happy employees, please.

• I’m about to start telling people, “As long as that makes sense to you,” when they say shit that doesn’t make sense to me.

• You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Top funny start quotes

• Old age comes at a bad time. Once you finally know everything, you start to forget everything you know.

• My advice to young people to prepare for getting older is to start stretching immediately.

• Might start signing off emails with, “But what do I know.”

• If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

• You’ll be watching a series, and they’ll just randomly start playing the best song you’ve ever heard in your life.

• Is 27 a good age to leave everything you know and love, and start over?

• Every time my neighbors start moaning, I pause my music to rate the performance.

• The minute I start feeling like a mother to a man, the relationship is over.

• What are y’all gonna do when those labubus come to life and start biting y’alls ankles?

• (at an incredibly low point in my life) I should start dating again.

Popular funny start quotes

• When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

• August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

• When a documentary starts with an old person going, ‘We’re a small town, we didn’t lock our doors at night,’ oh, we’re gonna find out what made them start.

• “You’re like if 9 a.m. on a Monday was a person.”

• You see how in cartoons, when they’re hungry, their friends start looking like a chicken leg? That’s how ovulation feels.

• Starting a new life today, bye.

• Stop rushing in the morning. You’re starting your day in panic mode.

• You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

• So heartbreaking to do laundry and realize you can’t wash the clothes you’re literally wearing right now… you will never have a completely fresh start.

• The best thing about dogs is you can act like something really good just happened, and they’ll instantly start celebrating too. They have no idea what the context is; they’re just always ready to party, no matter what.

More funny start quotes

• Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

• You either die a people pleaser, or live long enough to start leaving texts on read.

• The reason I stay up late is because I don’t want my free time to end, and tomorrow to start.

• Dating apps aren’t working, time to start drinking beer and eating hot dogs along the first base line at a baseball game.

• Please text me back. I’m about to start making stuff up in my head, and the stuff is all bad.

• I feel like you’re allowed to start your day at 4 p.m. if you are pure of heart.

• I’m going to start reading books again, as soon as I finish the internet.

• I like to minimize the disappointment by being myself right from the start.

• That uncle who kept his distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense to you as you get older.

• Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

Witty start quotes

• My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

• You know it’s bad when people start telling you that you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

• That uncle or aunt who kept their distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense as you get older.

• The Wi-Fi stops working for 2 minutes, and suddenly I start thinking about life.

• How I clean my room: 1. Start in one corner. 2. Find something from six years ago and stare at it nostalgically for five hours. 3. Go to bed.

• Libraries were a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn’t be allowed to talk.

• Babe, wanna come over and watch me apply for jobs on Indeed until I start to cry.

• Is it okay for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school, or am I just a terrible teacher?

• None of the parenting books say what to do when your kids start calling you ‘Bruh.’

• My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

Funny start quotes remind us that while starting sounds exciting 🎯, it usually comes with a side of procrastination, second-guessing, and plenty of funny stumbles 😂. Whether it’s starting a workout 🏋️‍♂️, a project 🖥️, or even just the day ☀️, beginnings rarely go smoothly 🤣. These quotes are perfect for anyone who’s mastered the art of “I’ll start tomorrow” 🙃. So embrace the messy starts, laugh at the delays, and enjoy the comedy of finally starting — eventually 🤪!