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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

“You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

Incredibly annoying that exercising, eating right, and drinking water can make you actually feel good.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

We used to burn CDs like we were running an underground record label.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Science has enough bodies, I’m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,263

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

I got my superpowers when I was bitten by a radioactive idiot.

Breaking via Twitch:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, can you give it a really good massage?

Live now on YouTube:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought putting your heart and soul into a relationship would make it work.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn’t come back, what you lost was a normal pigeon.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Super quick question: does anyone know what the point is?

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’m not built to work, I’m built to brood in a castle with all my unread books.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I started at the bottom and worked my way down.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Forever grateful that thought bubbles aren’t a real thing.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

Making waves on Slack:

I unload the dishwasher backwards… just to feel something.

Funny dream job quotes

Funny dream job quotes bring a hilarious twist to the grind, reminding us that chasing your passion doesn’t have to be all serious business 😂✨ Whether you’re dreaming of quirky careers or just need a laugh to survive Monday blues, these witty lines will brighten your day and spark some motivation 🤩💼 Ready to giggle and get inspired? Let’s dive into the lighter side of work life! 🚀🤣

New funny dream job quotes 👇

All funny dream job quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Pinterest this month:

I wish men had sluttier outfit options. Because why am I in a mini skirt, and you’re in a quarter zip?

39 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I admire how time manages to quickly heal wounds but takes forever to remove awkward tan lines.

52 shares on Threads this month:

ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

34 shares on Messenger this month:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

10 shares on Slack this month:

“I should’ve peed before I left,” will be my epitaph.

92 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

20 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Apparently, I’m not even going through a lot; I just need money.

53 shares on X this month:

I don’t even want a new year this year. I’ll take a lightly used 2006, if it’s available.

98 shares on Pinterest this month:

When I say I’m saving myself for marriage, what I mean is you won’t know how annoying I am until it’s too late.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

On Halloween, I’ll be handing out full size bars of really bad advice. Only while supplies last.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst is when it’s too late to take a nap but too early to go to bed.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

And where did Mr. Pepper receive his degree from exactly?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m getting to the age where it’s rude to pull out a bottle of ibuprofen if I don’t have enough for everyone.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

There are two wolves inside me, but please no one tell my landlord.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood is wild. One day I’m transferring money to my savings account, and three days later, I’m transferring it out to save myself.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,312

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Unfortunately, when you don’t burden people with your problems, they assume you don’t have any. Lol.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this but you’re not dying, it’s just Monday.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

Every time I use self-checkout, the person in front of me has never used self-checkout, touchscreens, or money before.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

How many of y’all are “burn a CD” and “lime wire” old?

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Why do plane tickets have to be so expensive? You’re literally going that way anyway. Just give me a ride.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

If I’m too much for you, then go and find less.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

Just shared via Reddit:

Boys say that girls are dramatic, but have you ever plucked a man’s eyebrow? They act like they’ve been shot.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

The worst part about going to work is the part where you have to go to work.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Only at 27 do you become old, and then when you turn 30, you become younger than ever. That’s just how it goes.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Ramen is just anime spaghetti.

Trending via Snapchat:

Introverts be like “I know a place”, then go home.

Live now on Pinterest:

Does anyone else run a used match under water before disposing of it because you’re afraid it still has some fire left in it, or are you normal?

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