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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I’m sorry, being on social media gave you the impression I’m a social person.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

If you meet me and I’m talking to myself, just keep walking. I’m self-employed and I’m in a meeting with senior management.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I need money, not feelings.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

The lion does not concern himself with the few small drops of pee that got on his boxers at the urinal even after he did a few shakes to be sure.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

The heart wants what it wants, but it’s not the only organ that has a vote.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I just sneezed my wife awake from a nap so any discussion about renewing vows is on hold for a bit.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1716 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,878

Funny Quotes Topics

14,699

Funny Quotes Images

11,878

3 minutes ago

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

50 is the new 30. Because it takes 50 bucks to buy what 30 used to.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

Going viral on Slack:

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Shared recently on Instagram:

People who don’t admit their mistakes disgust me. I would absolutely admit to a mistake if I had ever made one.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I’m an adult, but not the ‘makes positive life choices’ kind.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Telling everyone I’m an undecided voter because I need the attention.

Making waves on YouTube:

Name something cuter than a baby in a bucket hat on the beach.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Everybody say a little prayer for my husband, he just told me to calm down.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Your hoodie strings are uneven. Go home and get your shit together!

Seen just now on Instagram:

I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

Home » Funny Pet Owner Quotes

Funny pet owner quotes

Funny pet owner quotes 🐾 capture the hilarious moments that come with sharing your life with furry friends 🐶🐱. From unexpected antics to lovable quirks, these witty lines remind us why pets make everything better (and a little crazier!) 😂❤️ Whether you’re a dog lover, cat fanatic, or all-around animal enthusiast, get ready to smile and relate to the joys of pet parenthood! 🐕🎉🐾

New funny pet owner quotes 👇

2 weeks ago
Share →: Establish dominance over your cat by suddenly bolting out of the room for no reason.

Commentary:
Who knew cats were secretly training us for the Olympics? 🏃‍♂️🐈‍⬛😹
3 weeks ago
Share →: Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Commentary:
"Ah yes, I'm just the live-in butler for two tiny fur dictators! 🐾🏡😺"
2 months ago
Share →: Living with a dog is 90% following each other around, watching each other go potty, and wondering what the other has in their mouth.

Commentary:
😂 "So true! It's like living with a furry surveillance buddy who's always one sniff away from being banned on a plane! 🐶👀💩🔍"
6 months ago
Share →: Lovingly looking at my dog knowing I’m about to ruin her day with a bath.

Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate betrayal in the eyes of our loyal furry friends! 🐶💦It's all fun and games until the bath comes out, then suddenly we become the villain in their eyes! 😂 #DoggyDrama"
6 months ago
Share →: When I take a walk, I bring dog treats and people treats. I almost never mix them up.

Commentary:
"Taking a stroll equipped with both dog treats and people treats? 🐶🍬 Better watch out for those mix-ups! One accidental snack swap could lead to some very confused (and possibly offended) companions. Stay vigilant, treat distributor extraordinaire!"

For even more funny pet owner quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny pet owner quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1716 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,878

Funny Quotes Topics

14,699

Funny Quotes Images

11,878

3 minutes ago

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Once you’ve been single for a long time, you realize how exhausting relationships can be.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

If I buy the circus, the monkey will be the manager.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s difficult to play hard to get when I’m already hard to want.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

The best thing about driving in the snow is staying home.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

1pm, the perfect time to start doing the work I woke up early to get a jump on.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that “people with tattoos can’t get good jobs” and now we all agree that “people with and without tattoos can’t get good jobs”.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

A baby cow is called a calf because it’s half a cow. Half cow. Calf. No further questions.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Do you ever wish you could just walk away mid-conversation when you’re bored?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

God sends you an only child as a friend to test you.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Pinterest:

For as long as that song was, you’d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

Spotted on Telegram:

All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like, against my will.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Trending via Slack:

The one thing to know about me is I always get the last laugh. And oh yes, it’s maniacal.

Live now on YouTube:

Establish dominance over your cat by suddenly bolting out of the room for no reason.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

Going viral on X:

Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Twitter is basically a psychiatric ward where all the patients diagnose each other.

Spotted on YouTube:

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

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