Funny planned quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Turns out I like you a lot more than I originally planned.

  Commentary:
  Wow, looks like someone's unexpected feelings took a detour from the original itinerary! 🙈💕 Who knew detours could be so delightful? 😂 #UnexpectedLoveStops

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Dear God, thank you for the job I have. But if you have a lottery win planned for me, I’m ready! Thank you.

  Commentary:
  "Dear God, thank you for the job, but just in case you're feeling extra generous… I'm here, waiting with open arms and a winning ticket 🙏🎉💸 #InGodWeTrustAndWin"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I am such a fun person and so easy to get along with as long as the layout I have secretly imagined for the entire day goes exactly as I planned it without variation or interruption.

  Commentary:
  "Being flexible is definitely my strong suit, just as long as everything goes exactly as I envisioned it in my mind palace with absolutely zero deviations… 😅🤷‍♂️ Who needs spontaneity when you've got a perfectly crafted blueprint, am I right?"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a therapist when you have a pregnancy test to reassure you that *something* is going according to plan? 🙈🤰 #SilverLinings"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Any cults got something wild planned anytime soon? I’m trying to find the good estate sales.

  Commentary:
  "Looking for some killer deals, huh? Better watch out for those cults, they might have some 'killer' estate sales planned! 👀💰 Just make sure you don't accidentally sign up for their next pyramid scheme… or pyramid tomb? 🏛️😂 #EstateSaleGoals"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I made coffee and carried it to the couch. I’ve done everything I had planned for this Sunday.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the joys of adulting – when making coffee and moving from the kitchen to the couch qualify as major achievements! 🤣☕️ It's all about setting realistic goals, right? #SundayVibes"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Just because your parents planned you doesn’t mean you weren’t a mistake.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the age-old question: were we meticulously planned masterpieces, or just happy accidents? 🤔 Perhaps a little bit of both! Embrace your unique journey 💫👶 #HappyAccident"

For even more funny planned quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

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