50+ Funny Little Quotes That Prove It’s The Small Things That Make Us Laugh

New funny little quotes

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  Ripping the fishnets off my slutty little oranges.

  Commentary:
  When life gives you oranges, make sure they're ready for the party 🎉🍊👠

• 
  “Is this a joke to you?” Unfortunately, everything is a little bit of a joke to me.

  Commentary:
  Everything's a joke, especially on Mondays 😅🤪 #LifeIsComedy

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  I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like my car might qualify for a gym membership with all that speeding and stopping! 🚗💨🛑😅

• 
  Being a little freak is my love language.

  Commentary:
  Embracing my inner weirdo is how I say "I care" 🦄💖😜

• 
  Wow, you did such a great job clicking in your little spreadsheets today. Super proud of you.

  Commentary:
  Impressive work flexing those spreadsheet muscles today! 🏋️‍♂️📊💪 Keep clicking your way to glory!

• 
  A little mystery is the sweetest seduction.

  Commentary:
  Looks like my life is the ultimate seduction, considering even I can’t figure out what’s going on! 🤔🔍✨

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  I often got called “an old soul” and such like by adults when I was a child. I think this was a kind way of saying I was a sad little freak.

  Commentary:
  When you've had more 'senior moments' as a kid than your grandparents 😂🧓🎒

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  Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

  Commentary:
  When you try to put on your comfy PJs, but end up wearing existential dread instead 😂🛋️🌀

• 
  Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

  Commentary:
  Taking notes for the next office meeting: 1) Develop imposter syndrome, 2) Teach a masterclass on "How Not to Do Your Job" 😂📋💼

• 
  If David Bowie taught us anything, it’s that being a little weird is better than being forgettable.

  Commentary:
  Channeling my inner Bowie… I'm off to buy more glitter and a pet iguana just to keep things interesting! ✨🦎

Top funny little quotes

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  What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, but also a little grumpy.

  Commentary:
  Stronger? Sure. Grumpier? Absolutely. I'm evolving into a moody superhero! 💪😤🙃

• 
  Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

  Commentary:
  Finding humor in chaos: achieving zen or just embracing your inner wackadoodle 🤪🧘‍♂️😂

• 
  “God has a plan for you.” OK, is God open to a little feedback?

  Commentary:
  When God's life plan feels more like a rough draft than a final copy 😂✏️

• 
  A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

  Commentary:
  Adding a dash of mischief to my daily routine… it's basically soul food! 😈😇✨

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  Something very chic about crying while driving… have to keep it a little classy so you don’t crash… other drivers unaware a diva is down in the next lane over…

  Commentary:
  Channeling my inner emotional superstar while staying in my lane, where are the Oscars for road performances? 🎭🚗😂

• 
  A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

  Commentary:
  Pretending to be a pirate at the grocery store keeps life spicy! 🏴‍☠️🛒🙃

• 
  Aren’t you a little old to be a bully?

  Commentary:
  Sounds like someone missed the "grow up" memo! 😆📅 #AdultingFail

• 
  No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

  Commentary:
  When a fellow woman says you look fabulous, it feels like you just got a gold star from the universe 🌟💁‍♀️✨

• 
  I’m always a little mean to men because, if you treat them like humans, they think you wanna sleep with them.

  Commentary:
  Trying to find the balance between "hello" and "stay off my lawn" 😂👋🚫

• 
  It triggers the little girl in me when I feel like I’m not being listened to when I’m talking.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like it's time to bring out the invisible megaphone! 📣👧😆

Popular funny little quotes

• 
  Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the evolution of the stylish bro: from metro to performative. Next stop, fashion icon! 🚀👠💅

• 
  Even at my most powerful, I’m still a little sleepy.

  Commentary:
  "When I'm at full power, I'm basically a superhero in pajamas ready for a nap! 😴🦸‍♂️"

• 
  A pet resting their little paw on you is a sign of respect in their culture.

  Commentary:
  Paw-sitive affirmation: I'm officially their favorite human! 🐾😂

• 
  So much anger in this small little body. I feel like a chihuahua.

  Commentary:
  When you've got the heart of a lion, but the size of a purse dog 🦁🐕

• 
  If you haven’t felt old yet today, try explaining to a teenager how little kids used to sit on a phone book at dinner to be able to reach the table.

  Commentary:
  Explaining our "booster seats" to a teenager makes me feel like an ancient artifact 🧓📞😂

• 
  Sometimes, before bedtime, I fall asleep on the couch. It’s my little sleep appetizer… my nappetizer.

  Commentary:
  Couch naps are just the sneak preview before the main sleep feature 🍿😴 #NappetizerSpecial

• 
  You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

  Commentary:
  When your brain hits the eject button, love must be in the air! 😜💘🧠

• 
  Girls with long hair will literally leave little traces of themselves wherever they go, like feathers falling from an angel’s wings.

  Commentary:
  It's like living with a majestic breadcrumb trail, but instead of leading you home, it just clogs the vacuum! 🦸‍♀️🔍✨

• 
  Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like you've been preparing for the role of Night Owl Extraordinaire since childhood! 🌙🦉✨

• 
  Sometimes I do this fun little thing, where I take the time to write a grocery list, and then I forget it at home.

  Commentary:
  Grocery lists are like boomerangs; mine just never come back! 🍌📝🛒

More funny little quotes

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  Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

  Commentary:
  My cat won't give autographs without a tuna treat payment! 🐱🎬🐟

• 
  Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I never wanted to download the Microsoft Authenticator app on my personal phone to access every professional platform necessary to do my job.

  Commentary:
  Who knew "adulting" was just code for "download all the apps your kid self never dreamed of"? 😂📱🔐

• 
  A little 9-5 with a little fraud on the side is the only way you gone survive in this world.

  Commentary:
  When Creative Finance 101 meets Hustler's Academy 🎨💼💸😆

• 
  Cats clean themselves with their little fish breath mouths, but somehow they always smell like laundry detergent, vanilla, and happiness.

  Commentary:
  Sounds like they've cracked the secret recipe for Eau de Purr-fume. 🐱✨🧼

• 
  If your girlfriend doesn’t go a little psycho on you from time to time, then she’s not in love with you, sweetie.

  Commentary:
  When she starts acting like a detective over a missed text, you know it's true love! 🔍❤️😂

• 
  When you’re feeling down, just turn up the music a little louder.

  Commentary:
  Crank it up to 11 and let the good vibes drown out the grumbles! 🎶🔊😄

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  Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

  Commentary:
  Ah yes, the childhood dream of becoming a professional "tone monitor" is finally coming true! 🎤🕵️‍♀️✨

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  They won’t teach you this in school, but life is all about going to weird little diners.

  Commentary:
  Life's true curriculum: mastering the art of navigating sticky menus and deciphering cryptic specials! 🍽️😂

• 
  Anyone else brush their teeth in the shower so they can get a little sloppy with it, or is that just me?

  Commentary:
  Multitasking level: expert 🦷🚿😂

• 
  I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

  Commentary:
  "Living in your own little world is not a problem when you're the beloved Mayor of that world! 🌍🤣"

Witty little quotes

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  Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

  Commentary:
  "Whoever said medication couldn't be fun clearly hasn't seen me in action – humming, dancing, and organizing pills like a pro! 💊💃 Embrace the nutty side, it's the happiest one! 😜 #PillPoppingDiva"

• 
  If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

  Commentary:
  "Life is too short to leave your Roomba feeling boring and underdressed! 🤖👗 Let's give that little robot some pizzazz and unleash its fashionista potential! Who says vacuuming can't be stylish? 💃✨ #FashionForwardRobots"

• 
  No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the healing power of cartoons! 📺✨ Who knew they could be the perfect antidote for dealing with the 'stupidness' around us? 🤪 Just remember, a little laughter goes a long way in any silly situation! 😂"

• 
  Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

  Commentary:
  "Arguing with little kids is like going toe-to-toe with a tiny tyrant armed with sass and an endless arsenal of 'whys' 😂👧 Let the battle of wits with the pint-sized foes begin!"

• 
  Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

  Commentary:
  "Slow and steady wins the race…unless you're just aiming to be a little above the bottom! 😄🐢 Keep on climbing that ladder of success, one small step at a time! 🌟 #ProgressIsProgress"

• 
  There’s no need to put a little umbrella in my drink. It’s already wet.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a tiny umbrella when your drink is already making a splash! 🍹☔️ Your glass is full of attitude and moisture – no extra accessories needed! 😄💦"

• 
  I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

  Commentary:
  "Imagine going to the doctor's office and finding a trail of treats leading to the examination room! 🐾 Who says bribing with snacks only works on pets? 🍖😂 Maybe we should start a 'treats-for-patients' movement! 🏥 #DoctorVsVet"

• 
  Worst part about not buying snacks so you won’t eat snacks is not having snacks when you need a lil snack.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, the eternal struggle of snack-deprivation vs snack-cravings! 🍿🍫 It's like a vicious cycle of snacking regrets and snackless despair! 😂 The snack struggle is real, my friend! Stay strong in the face of snack temptation! 💪🏼 #SnackAttack"

• 
  Some stupid little amoeba decided to leave the ocean a billion years ago and now I have to worry about Monday.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the audacity of that restless amoeba changing the course of evolution! Now we have to deal with Mondays, the struggle is real 🙄🌊 #BlameTheAmoeba"

• 
  Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

  Commentary:
  Looks like a case of laugh-trickling! 😂💦 When your bladder has its own sense of humor! 👀 #LaughingLeakages