Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

My wife refuses to hire a housekeeper because she doesn’t want them to see this mess.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

I wish I could physically experience the inside of a lava lamp.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Women pretending not to see men staring at them is an essential survival skill.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

I wonder how many people think, “What the hell?” after talking to me.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

My superpower is always picking the line at the grocery store that moves the slowest.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

People out there having five-year plans, and here I am waking up just hoping I remember what day it is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

Last night’s dream could have been an email.

Trending via Snapchat:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Shared recently on Discord:

Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

Spotted on Telegram:

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Why are those Mad Max guys always driving around, it’s not like there’s anywhere to go?

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.

Spotted on TikTok:

There’s nothing more satisfying than the little nap you have after hitting snooze on your alarm.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Controlling your anger at work is a job in itself.

Just shared via Twitch:

If she says “it’s fine,” you’re probably in trouble.

Funny brake quotes

Funny brake quotes 🚗😆 put the pedal on pause and bring a smile to every driver’s face! Whether you’re stuck in traffic or just love witty car humor, these clever lines will have you hitting the brakes with laughter. Ready to stop, laugh, and roll? Let’s dive into some hilarious sayings that prove sometimes slowing down is the best way to speed up your mood! 😂🛑 #BrakeTimeFun

New funny brake quotes 👇

All funny brake quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Twitch this month:

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

48 shares on Telegram this month:

When you say “You’re going to hate me for this,” you’re making a very large assumption that I don’t hate you already.

48 shares on Threads this month:

I hate when people call my phone! I don’t use it for that.

63 shares on Instagram this month:

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

23 shares on Discord this month:

An electric car is just another electric chair.

87 shares on WeChat this month:

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

60 shares on Slack this month:

I love surprising my metabolism. It never knows what’s coming—either absolute starvation or 1,000+ calories all at once.

54 shares on TikTok this month:

The length of a LinkedIn Post is directly proportional to the amount of bullshit in it.

24 shares on Slack this month:

I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I’m grateful that thoughts don’t appear as bubbles over our heads.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Your skull is the only thing preventing your brain from floating away, unburdened as it is by any meaningful thought to anchor it.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Monday: The only day when you can wear the same outfit from the day before without anyone noticing.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s okay to embarrass yourself a little in the pursuit of human connection.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Everything feels like thinking the stripper actually likes you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,456

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Today, I want to talk about underperforming continents. Antarctica, explain yourself.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

I’m not scared of love, I’m scared of insufficient cash.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Hate when other parents at school drop off act like they’re better than me just because they remembered to bring all of their children.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m not even sure what I’m doing on this planet.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

The worst thing I’ve seen as a paramedic is my paycheck.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

If you don’t like me, remember: it’s mind over matter. I don’t mind, and you don’t matter.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

People out here living double lives, and I’m barely even holding a single life together.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Christmas is a very special time when I give my brother a $100 gift card, and he gives me a $100 gift card.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Salad was likely invented after someone picked everything they didn’t like out of their meal and put it on a separate plate.

Seen just now on Discord:

I’m at the age where I understand why my parents never wanted to stop for anything on the way home from work.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

I will never be the person this serving size suggestion wants me to be.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

Trending via YouTube:

My favorite part of socializing is when it’s over.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Grown men asking Grok if this is real.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Nostalgia is mostly dumb nonsense, but movie rental stores were legitimately better than streaming.

Spotted on Facebook:

My résumé is really just a list of things I hope I never have to do again.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Just landed via Facebook:

Not gonna lie, the age I’m turning this year sounds a little serious, and I don’t like it.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴