Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

My desire to be informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Was already at my breaking point, and then had to use the authenticator app.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Adding “but that’s just me” after giving the absolute worst advice to a coworker.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Me pulling into a full parking lot: Don’t these people have homes?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Nothing ruins an introvert’s day like a 4 p.m. appointment.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Not to brag, but my best yoga pose is awkward facing dog.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

“It’s bikini season,” I whisper, eating another bikini.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I’m perfectly approachable as long as you’re carrying a plate of nachos.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

I bet it feels so good for a cat to headbutt someone they adore.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Dec 22, 2025

3,745

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

Waking up early is cool until it starts feeling like you’ve had a long day at 10 a.m.

Going bananas on Slack:

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Betrayal is when you’re holding a baby, and they put their arms out for someone else.

Seen just now on Discord:

Narcissus fell in love with his own image, but was immediately annoyed at how it always tried to talk while he was talking.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Television is better for you than phone. It is like vaping vs smoking.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Not arguing with people anymore, I’m just gonna say “it makes sense that you would think that”.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

A weighted blanket isn’t enough today, I need to be compressed into a zip-file.

Just landed via Reddit:

Sparkling water tastes like that feeling when your foot falls asleep.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked, whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I wanna become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

Home » Funny Brake Quotes

Funny brake quotes

Funny brake quotes 🚗😆 put the pedal on pause and bring a smile to every driver’s face! Whether you’re stuck in traffic or just love witty car humor, these clever lines will have you hitting the brakes with laughter. Ready to stop, laugh, and roll? Let’s dive into some hilarious sayings that prove sometimes slowing down is the best way to speed up your mood! 😂🛑 #BrakeTimeFun

New funny brake quotes 👇

Ever been in the car with someone who drives so fast that you press your imaginary brakes on the passenger side?

0

3 months ago

brake, car, driving, ever, fast, humor, imaginary, imaginary brake, passenger, press, side, someone, speed
I brake for no one, except squirrels.

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5 months ago

animal, brake, driving, except, humor, i, squirrel, squirrels
I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

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5 months ago

advice, being, brake, car, driver, driving, gas, gently, good, humor, i, know, little, put, skill, using

All funny brake quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

41 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Picking up women at the bar and then gently setting them down.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

Does anyone else feel like their brain has a hundred tabs open at once?

60 shares on Discord this month:

Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

81 shares on Discord this month:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

43 shares on Instagram this month:

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

67 shares on WeChat this month:

They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

“Life is a marathon, not a sprint.” Cool, I dislike both of those things.

22 shares on Facebook this month:

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been commissioned to kiss you on the lips. I need to get this done by tonight.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I always do my best sleeping in the 10 minutes before my alarm goes off.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I quit boxing the moment I realized my opponent was allowed to punch me in the face, too.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Turtles made out of plastic, problem solved.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Everybody’s back hurts until it’s time to have sexy time.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Why can’t the house clean itself? It seems to get dirty by itself.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t worry, baby, the back pain is because your wings are growing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,926

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Ears are great for tucking your hair behind in the wind. Big shout out to ears.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

“Hope this email finds you doing well!” The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

WW3: I can’t fire my weapon unless I first watch a 15-second unskippable ad for Raid Shadow Legends.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

My most boomer complaint is that nobody knows how to bring an item out of courtesy to parties anymore.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Taking screenshots of the screenshots buried in my photo library to ‘bring them to the front.’ It’s not a great system, I admit.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

I tried to embrace my flaws. They filed a restraining order.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

I am single, please disturb me!

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

Just shared via Instagram:

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed over their chest because of the belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Cool times create cool guys.

Spotted on Threads:

I regret to inform you that the secret to appearing well-read is to read.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

Seen just now on WeChat:

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Making waves on Pinterest:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Trending via Snapchat:

Can we not just call it Zealand now?

Shared recently on Reddit:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

Going viral on YouTube:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

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