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New funny quotes: 56 this month

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Updated: Mar 13, 2026

 

 

 

 

16 Funny divine quotes

Funny divine quotes bring a heavenly dose of laughter πŸ˜‡βœ¨, blending wisdom with wit to brighten your day! Whether you’re seeking a cheeky reminder from above or just a lighthearted spiritual giggle πŸ˜‚πŸ™, these gems are sure to uplift your soul and tickle your funny bone. Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even snort with joy as you dive into the playful side of the divine! πŸŒŸπŸ˜„

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

Posted onFeb 3, 2026

God doesn’t do nearly enough smiting anymore.

Posted onFeb 2, 2026

I think God was high when he made me.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

If there is a God and He β€œloves” us, then explain snakes.

Posted onFeb 1, 2026

I think God’s next test for me should be, “Can he handle a ridiculous amount of money.”

Posted onJan 31, 2026

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

Posted onJan 31, 2026

I firmly believe that at this point my guardian angel is just eating popcorn and watching the drama.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

My guardian angel is taking the longest smoking break in recorded history.

Posted onJan 31, 2026

God: “You can’t just say ‘Goddammit!’ and expect Me to damn it. There’s a procedure. File the paperwork.”

Posted onJan 29, 2026

God: “I used to work in mysterious ways but now I’m unemployed.”

Posted onJan 29, 2026

God: “You’re all really bad at this.”

Posted onJan 29, 2026

God: “You’re all a bunch of bastards and I should never have created you.”

Posted onJan 28, 2026

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Posted onJan 28, 2026

God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

Posted onJan 28, 2026

God: “I genuinely don’t remember making you all this stupid.”

Posted onJan 28, 2026

β€œGod has a plan for you.” OK, is God open to a little feedback?

Posted onJan 19, 2026

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