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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, I shut it off and back on again, why are you still here?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

The lion does not concern himself with the few small drops of pee that got on his boxers at the urinal even after he did a few shakes to be sure.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

When my husband says, “Let me ask my wife,” he’s just using me as an excuse to get out of whatever you’re asking him to do.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Being single past 30 is like playing hide and seek, except no one is looking for you.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

Who is this Rorschach guy and where did he get all the pictures of my parents fighting?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

My therapist said cutting people off isn’t healthy. She’s next.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

When you turn 50, they change the lightbulb in your fridge to that memory eraser from Men in Black.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

35 minutes ago

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

When you have bad handwriting, notes to yourself are just fun little riddles you get to solve later.

Shared recently on Discord:

There’s two sides to every story, and then there’s these screenshots I got.

Trending via YouTube:

Considering that doctors are never on time, they should tell you to come a half hour late, not early.

Spotted on Discord:

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I’m gonna need everybody to stop living here.

Spotted on TikTok:

Who needs therapy when you can gaslight yourself into thinking that everything is fine?

Seen just now on Discord:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Shared recently on Discord:

Yeah, no worries, man. You just showed everyone that you have a lot of resentments bubbling underneath, but otherwise, it was a cool evening.

Going viral on Instagram:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Reported on Instagram:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

Trending via TikTok:

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Home » Funny Equivalent Quotes

Funny equivalent quotes

New funny equivalent quotes 👇

2 months ago
Share →: Me liking your post is the equivalent of an angel kissing your forehead.

Commentary:
"Oh great, now I need a halo for all this forehead kissing! 😇💋"
5 months ago
Share →: Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

Commentary:
🤣 Ah, the rebellious thrill of sharpening a pencil at the bin! It was our little act of defiance, our moment of clandestine coolness in the schoolyard. Who needs a cigarette break when you've got a freshly sharpened #2 pencil, right? Childhood priorities at their finest! 🚬📝
6 months ago
Share →: Forgetting your phone at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times.

Commentary:
"Oops! Looks like I've left my trusty sword of connectivity at home today. 🤦‍♂️ Who knew that facing the day without our phones would be as nerve-wracking as facing a dragon without a sword? 🐉⚔️ Stay brave, fellow modern-day knights, and may we all survive this epic quest of forgetfulness!"

For even more funny equivalent quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny equivalent quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

35 minutes ago

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Gonna run this by my two best friends who are as insane as I am.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

While you were rotting and wasting your life away, I was doing the exact same thing.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 40’s: you get excited about avocados now.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Sleep is a free trial of death but with ads.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via X:

The worst part about getting sucked up by the tornado you’re filming is to die knowing your wife was right. You are an idiot.

Just shared via Instagram:

If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

Just shared via TikTok:

I am physically, mentally and emotionally ready to enter a new phase in my life…. hibernation.

Shared recently on Reddit:

People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.

Seen just now on Slack:

I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

There are advantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it. There are disadvantages to living alone: everything always stays where you put it.

Trending via Facebook:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Freshly posted on Slack:

Relationship rule: If the woman has told something and the man doesn’t remember, the man hasn’t listened. If the man has told something and the woman doesn’t remember, the man has never told it.

Just landed via Discord:

Life would be so much easier if the nose of people who lie all the time did actually grow longer like Pinocchio’s.

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