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14 Funny haunted quotes

Trending Funny Haunted Quotes 🔥

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.
In English we say: “You changed.” But in poetry we say: “You became a stranger wearing the face I used to love, and I am haunted by the ghost of who you were.”
A haunted house, but every room is just learning more about Will & Jada.
Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.
No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

New funny haunted quotes 👇

2 weeks ago
Share →: I really hope my house is haunted and not in need of structural repairs.

Commentary:
"Haunted house: Spooky fun. Structural repairs: Spooky bills! 👻🔨💸"
2 months ago
Share →: I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Commentary:
Oh, the nostalgic longing for those spooky nights at the strip club with The Weeknd's eerie tunes 🌙💃🎶! It's like reminiscing about that unique hybrid of chills and thrills you never knew you'd miss so dearly. Who would've thought haunted strip club music could hold such a special place in our hearts? 😂✨ #SpookyStrippers
4 months ago
Share →: No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Commentary:
"Who needs haunted houses when you have financial statements to send shivers down your spine? Forget ghosts and goblins, the real horror story is checking your retirement savings in this economy!"
5 months ago
Share →: The goth urge to live in a haunted Victorian estate and be feared by the townspeople.

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle between wanting to be goth and wanting to own a fabulous real estate portfolio…🦇🕸️ Who needs acceptance and friendship when you can have ominous creaks and cobweb-filled corners instead? 😂 #GothGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. I’ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

Commentary:
"Either the house *ghost*ed you or you've been living with some very lively spirits all this time! 👻😂 Who you gonna call? Definitely not the Ghostbusters! 🚫👻 #HauntedHouseMystery"
5 months ago
Share →: Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Commentary:
Looks like the scariest thing we'll encounter in haunted houses this year is 2020 news coverage! 👻🏚️ Get ready for jump scares and breaking news alerts! 😱📰
5 months ago
Share →: A haunted house but in every room someone is asking you to say a little something about yourself.

Commentary:
Welcome to the most terrifying interactive haunted house experience yet! 👻 In this spine-chilling abode, prepare to face the scariest monsters of all: small talk enthusiasts lurking in every corner, ready to pounce with the dreaded question: "So, tell me a little about yourself." 😱 Beware, for there is no escape from this nightmare of endless self-descriptions! Enter if you dare… and don't forget your elevator pitch! 🏚️💬
5 months ago
Share →: In English we say: “You changed.” But in poetry we say: “You became a stranger wearing the face I used to love, and I am haunted by the ghost of who you were.”

Commentary:
When dealing with heartbreak, English gets right to the point while poetry takes the scenic route and grabs a cup of tea along the way ☕️💔 Emotions are like a complex labyrinth – one moment you're discussing change, the next you're wistfully pondering ghosts of relationships past 👻💔 Ah, the power of language to beautifully capture the messiness of love and loss! 📜❤️ #PoetryVsProse
5 months ago
Share →: A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

Commentary:
👻 Welcome to the scariest place of all… the haunted house of awkward social interactions! Picture this: you enter a dimly lit room, feeling the gaze of many eyes on you. As you tentatively make your way through the crowd, instead of ghosts jumping out from the shadows, you are met with people eagerly awaiting your fun fact reveal! The horror, the suspense, the sheer terror of having to come up with something interesting to say about yourself on the spot! Truly,
5 months ago
Share →: They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

Commentary:
"Who ya gonna call? 🚫👻 Imagine the Yelp reviews on that: 'Great location, spacious rooms, but the ghost in the attic is a bit too chatty for my liking.' 😂🏠 #HauntedHouseHunting"